I had to work the late shift last night (till 1am) and was looking forward till the late night ride back home. The MUP I take home follows along a beach that closes at 10pm so the only thing on there is the occasional cyclist out for a late night ride. As I am riding home on the MUP I had the beach and it's firepits on my left and the empty beach parking lots on my right.

In the middle of my ride home my headlight catches a body laying next to one of the fire pits. I thought perhaps it was a homeless person that was just trying to stay warm for the night but as I got closer I noticed it was a man wearing a sweatshirt that looked brand new...not something I've ever seen on the homeless around here. The next thought that went through my head was that this person was dead, severely injured, passed out from alcohol consumption, or in some way needed immediate help. The body is laying on it's side facing away from me and it's dark enough that even with the headlight of my bike I can barely make out the body.

I get off my bike, leave the MUP, and start walking my bike in the sand toward the body. I can't make out any movement so I continue to get closer. I get about 10 feet away and then the person suddenly rolls toward me and shouts "HEY! What the F#$%?!?!?". It was at that point that I realized the man now facing me had his front area fully exposed and that there had been a woman there hidden in the darkness by her black dress...who's head was down at his waist. He started to get up and button his fly and I am sure this wasn't going to end well.

I freaked...I didn't say sorry, I didn't apologize...I bolted out of there faster than I ever thought I could running with a bike through sand. I spent the next 45 minutes of my commute home laughing.

You definitely see things commuting on your bike that you don't see driving in your car.

NOTE TO SELF: always throw a rock first from a safe distance to test.

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Awesome.

I've heard of "blow-outs" on the ride home, but...

LOL...that's clever.

Jeebus. I thought I had a hard time dodging Hummers while riding on the road!!!!

That'll teach you to be a good samaritan...

Or get brighter lights!

This could fall under clever also

I love a happy ending.

Reason #69 to buy better lights.

did you ask her "Shraeder or Presta"

I guess the guy wasn't into "dodging".

So uhhh.... was she hot?

geeze, even dead guys are getting more play than me.

Great storyteller, you are. I was actually a little freaked out after reading only the first couple lines. `Oh Jesus, the poor guy found a dead body. How sad...`

I've actually seen a dead person while cycling. Drowning victim in a canal. The cops were trying to fish him out of the water. I watched him bob up and down for a while, and then left.

man what an epic story. I didn't quite understand the man rolling at first, I thought it was a guy rolling up to you in a car but then after reading it again realized it was the man on the ground. That is such a win commute home, I haven't seen anything interesting yet.

Oh, I'm glad I wasn't drinking something when I read this post (and some of the replies). I'd add my own comment, but it seems better to let sleeping dogs lie.

Man that tale really blew me away...

I usually yell at potentially dead people before investigating. Well, not that I have, but I would.

"Hey, ya dead man? Oh, getting a BJ? Oh cool, carry on."

I think if there was more bj's the world would be a happier place.

But man that sand could have been nasty....for the bike

I once read a post on another forum about a guy who was supposedly commuting home on his bike after dark through a park. As he passed one of the trees, he noticed that there were three men under it: Two standing, with their pants down, and a third, apparently a homeless gentleman, on his knees. The cyclist fellow apparently decided to circle back around for a second look.

Now, I wouldn't have believed this story if I'd just read it. But the dude had taken pics when he passed by them for the second time.