anyone else ride to forget a failed relationship?
 

It helps me release a lot of frustration and other emotions.

Guess I haven't tried riding to forget, but I know I feel better about problems when I ride.
A very wise man once told me that action defeats anxiety.

It would make sense.
Endorphin release would calm the nerves and make you feel better.

But I haven't done it. I've had the same GF for the 2.5 years that I've been seriously riding.

Besides, why ride to forget a girl? That's what whisky and hookers were invented for. Don;t you know anything?:lol:

Yes. I never thought I waould talk about that here but I got dumped by my best friend after 9 1/2 years and after 2 weeks or so I would ride just to ride. I am so glad I had my bike when I could not get to sleep or on my days off.

Riding sure helps, and if you can run them over along the way it helps a broken heart recover even quicker. :roflmao2:

Just kidding though.

I started riding about two months after my ex-wife moved out. That's not why I started riding, but it did help me cope. I lived alone for a full year before dating (intentionally) to get my priorities straight, screw my head on right, and lose weight.

I've since met a wonderful woman, and I'll marry her in September.

Glad to hear it - the gal that I met in January and encouraged me to get a bike, even helped me choose the Trek ended up trading me in for a rather younger model and got engaged in only 3 weeks or so. Rendered me pretty irrelevant, I had to admit. We're still friends, or at least I'm willing to be, but she's apparently so self-absorbed in her life that everything else, me included, has pretty much fallen by the wayside. So every time I ride I think of her....ugh. What a life.

Oh well, hopefully another door might open even as this one closes.....

Tom

relationship? What relationship? All you need is your bike :D

Tom, if I can give a few pieces of advice; at 50 and with more than a few past relationships under my belt I have some experience.

First, wallow for a week (only one week), then get off your @ss and focus on letting it go. Unfortunately, trying to be her friend will only prolong your pain.

Second, there is NO 'hopefully' another door will open; a door will definitely open if you begin to shake it off and focus on tomorrow and not on yesterday. The longer you focus on what was the longer it will take you to move on.

Lastly, spring is here, get out and ride ride ride ride and ride, there are soooo many beautiful amazing women out there looking for a good guy it ain't even funny.

Now you're even more relationship smart and in a few month you’ll be even better prepared for that great lady coming your way; I say a few month because you have to first clear your heart and head before allowing this new woman enter (don't rush it). When she does come along, leave the baggage outside and do not reflect on the past woman when the new woman comes along.

Best of luck to you; 2009 is providing you with a new and fresh start.

One other good thing about getting out and riding is that when you are ready to start dating again you will be meeting a lot of extremely attractive and active women who also bike. Not a bad deal being able to start out with something significant in common.

I'll say this much...

"The Bicycle is The Greatest Common Denominator in my life."

that is... of all things in my life, the most consistent aspect of it, has been The Bicycle. I have always been on a bike.

around 14yrs ago, a buddy came into the shop where i was working on my bike, and his boy, then 5 years old...

we poked fun that i was always working on a bike.

"I love my bike"

in a taunting 5 year old way, "if you love it why don't you marry it?"

"well, i guess i could try, but i think if i tried to put a dress on it, it would just rip."

we all had big laffs about that!

Quite coincidentally, I am freshly single and looking to start riding in a month. Hope it works! :)

maybe the thing about bikes is that they can only go forwards...

Not on a fg

really? I know nought about fg's (fixed gear, right?)... you can actually go into reverse? wow! :D

My wife of 13 years and I are divorcing. Riding helps me think things through.

This thread popping up is quite a coincidence. I am typing this on my IMAC, which sits on a desk. The desk is the only thing in the apt. that she didn't take. I am standing while typing. She just moved out today after we had the EFF IT ALL argument two days ago. We were together for over two years.

The apt. is empty, save my bikes, cameras/photo equipment and my computer on this desk. She even took all of the food out of the fridge. Suck.

Back to cleaning......
So, maybe I should go for a ride, huh? The sun is shining......

Heck sometimes I ride to forget my successful relationship.

John

Booze and cigarettes worked for me once, but I think you've got a better idea :thumb:

When I ride my bike I feel free... Free to remember the good times and understand change...
A person I have loved, I can never stop loving, 'though other things change :)

Sorry to hear about your relationship troubles.......

Just celebrated my 27th wedding anniv. yesterday! 29 years together in total. She doesn't even ride a bike! I have been an inveterate bike commuter for 20 + years.........We are happier and more in love now then when we met 29 years ago.........



Any kind of exercise is good for depression and anxiety (the real psych. kind) and also good for the lay meaning of being "down."

Communication is key to a long standing good relationship.........

And introspection and self-exploration can help find out why things didn't work out.....

Remember the only people we can change are ourselves.........took me a long time to learn that but it is amazing that changing yourself and your attitudes can actually affect those around you (you can often get the change you want from those around you).......

Ghandi: "Be the change you want"

Proper exercise can help a huge amount with emotional problems.

Where did I read this quote ?
"Wherever your relationship is headed, you'll get there faster on a tandem."

Sports that require focus are great for clearing your head and reducing stress. The day may have been crap, but the ride accomplishes something good for you. I really like bike commuting as a nice way to decompress after a rough day at work. At home after riding I am often grateful to have time to just relax and do whatever I want to do (translate: do NOTHING).

In my divorce, she got my classic car and I got her mountain bike. I think I made off well. :thumb:

I have a friend who has a rule of thumb: you get to mope for one month, max, for every year that you were in a relationship with your ex. Oh, and if you were never really in a relationship? That's right, you don't get to mope at all, you just get an express ticket to Getting Over It.

People who are newly and reluctantly single hate my friend's rule of thumb. It makes them scream. It makes a lot of sense to the people around them, though.

Then I have 14 months of moping. I think I will divide that by 3 or 4.... that is unless I can extend it backwards since I have known this is coming.

I got divorced in the early 90's. At the time I thought I was going to die.

Fast forward 15 years or so and I realize it's the greatest thing that ever happened to me.

John

:( Sorry to hear about that mate.

Hey, you're always allowed to cut it short. In fact, you get bonus points in life if you can do so.

Thanks :)

The main thing I am having issues with is when my 5 year old son is with his mom for her 50%. I miss the bugger like crazy. I hope I get used to this soon.
After all this is only the first week. ugh