VICE PRESIDENT GORE:
I fight for the chickens and I am fighting for the chickens right now. I
will not give up on the chickens crossing the road! I will fight for
the chickens and I will not disappoint them.

GOVERNOR GEORGE W. BUSH:
Idon't believe we need to get the chickens across the road. I say
give the road to the chickens and let them decide. The government needs
to let go of strangling the chickens so they can get across the road.

SENATOR LIEBERMAN:
I believe that every chicken has the right to wrship his or her God in his or her own way. Crossing the road is a spiritual journey and no chicken should be denied the right to cross the road in his or her own way.

SECRETARY CHENEY:
Chickens are big-time because they have wings. They could fly if they
wanted to. Chickens don't want to cross the road. They don't need help
crossing the road. In fact, I'm not interested in crossing the road.

RALPH NADER:
Chickens are misled into believing there is a road by the evil tire makers.
Chickens aren't ignorant, but our society pays tire makers to create the need
for these roads and then lures chickens into believing there is an advantage
to crossing them. Down with the roads, up with chickens.

PAT BUCHANAN:
To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.

JERRY FALWELL:
Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see the
plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other
side."
That's what "they" call it-the "other side." Yes, my friends, that chicken
is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we
boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal
media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side."
That chicken should not be free to cross the road. It's as plain and simple
as that.

DR. SEUSS:
Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes! The
chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed, I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY:
To die. In the rain.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.:
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross without having
their motives called into question.

GRANDPA:
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us
that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

ARISTOTLE:
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

KARL MARX:
It was a historical inevitability.

SADDAM HUSSEIN:
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in
dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK:
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

FOX MULDER:
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens
have to cross before you believe it?

FREUD:
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the
road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES:
I have just released eChicken 2000, which will not only cross roads,
but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook
-and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.

EINSTEIN:
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the
chicken?

BILL CLINTON:
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by "chicken"?
Could you define "chicken" please?

THE BIBLE:
And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt
cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

COLONEL SANDERS:
I missed one?

i still say the chicken crossed the road to prove to the porcupine that it was possible.

Marquis De Sade-
To get away from me, dammit

SADDAM HUSSEIN 2: "It is the mother of all chickens".

Chris

All this chicken talk's makin me hungry...

Tyson Foods, Inc: "...bringing you tastier, healthier chicken at a lower price.... because it was roadkill."

Isn't there a Vegetarian option?

Rich