Originally Posted by Fib

Also, this is completely unrelated to the topic, but I noticed your username had "photography" in it, are you a photographer?

Originally Posted by nycphotography

it has been an off and on hobby for years.

Originally Posted by nycphotography

And finally, take this for what it's worth, but I'll call it the "grown up advice for the internet".

This is perhaps the hardest thing about growing up and learning to deal in the big ugly real world, but if you can learn to NOT REACT to things, you will be able to walk into hostile situations and conduct yourself with APLOMB.

DO NOT REACT. TRIAGE / OBSERVE / ANALYZE, then ACT with full intent.

When attacked, figure out what the attack is saying about the attacker (someone is on a crusade against trolls), and what it is saying about you (maybe it's not even an attack on you, maybe you just misinterpreted it?), and what it is saying about the context/situation (there be trolls about these parts). When you have those three things, then you can ACT (in control) in order to further your goals, rather than REACTING (loss of control both of self and also of the interaction) which furthers their goals and usually is detrimental to your own goals.

In this case, simply say "I'm a 16 y/o girl and I would just like help with my bicycle." Period.

Simply don't respond to the trolling... and defintitely don't let it get to you, or at least don't let it SHOW that it got to you. Don't say "don't harass me, stop this, don't do that". It basically looks like weakness and insecurity on your part, and it lets the discussion get sidelined into places that are not about helping you fix your bike. Shakespeare: The lady doth protest too much.

Also, the mods can figure out a sock puppet PDQ. Rather than argue with a someone, just click the "report post" button, and rather than TELL anyone anything, ASK "why is this guy attacking me? What did I do wrong?".

Or even ask in the thread. When you get yor answer, simply state "oh. Well you're wrong, that wasn't me." and then consider it asked and answered.

Consider the difference here: You are humbly asking for help, for guidance, for understanding, without ego. Versus thrashing out to defend your honor, your self image, your ego. You do not have to defend your honor with words, because the your honor will guide your actions and will always show true eventually.

FINALLY: do your best to demonstrate that you are using/considering/researching the advice offered. Simply reporting back on steps taken and on progress goes a long way towards encouraging useful input and discouraging useless/sarcastic input.

All that said, there are obviously a lot of grown ass people who clearly don't understand the grown up world. But don't take that as an excuse for why you don't have to or shouldn't need to. Simply recognize it for what it is, while continuing to work on your own self.

Originally Posted by wheelreason

Must be nice going through life clueless and thinking you have it all figured out.

Originally Posted by wheelreason

Must be nice going through life clueless and thinking you have it all figured out.