Maybe you are just replying specifically to pgjackson here, but here is my view on this. Yea, I jumped the gun. I wasn't trying to be dishonest about the situation, I made the offer, he accepted at which point I thought I would have the opportunity to make my final decision. When I found out I didn't, I was simply looking if there was an honest and ethical way of not making the purchase. When I emailed him, he said no. I followed through.

I dont see anything "squirly" about that. I wasn't generating a false sense of goodwill. In my eyes, I was honest and ethical and i ended up follwing through with my side of the deal when I realized there was option for a no purchase.

You absolutely did the right and ethical thing by following through after the seller refused to let you back out. My limited personal experience, as a buyer, is that an eBay store is more likely let you back out than individual. Maybe the stores are used to deal with things like that and they have a return policy any way.

As a fairly regular eBay seller for my spare parts and whatnot, I wish there are more buyers like you on eBay. I had a fairly heated eBay debate with a few BFers on another thread not a long ago, where the sense of entitlement as a buyer is truly astounding, as if the seller can do whatever they want because they have the money. Unfortunately, I think it's a reflection of our larger society.

Yea, but this was an individual person not a company. I wish he would have understood my situation, but he didnt so lesson learned and I will try to think it through more carefully next time.

Did he post any return policy?

Buyers are entitled. We are the ones spending our money. The seller can get all pissy about finicky buyers, but that's how it is when your job is selling stuff. Every single store in every single mall in the world deals with returns and picky buyers. Get over it. It is not a reflection of "our larger society", it's a reflection of poor customer service. There are stores that just want your money and could care less if you ever come back...then there are stores that care about customer service and company reputation. When you sell stuff on e-bay, the deal isn't done till money and product changes hands.

No, I didn't mean to include you in my theoretical scenario. I think you did the right thing.

And I will point out that yes, the deal isn't done until money and product changes hands. Nobody is disputing that, and it's not unique to eBay. Every store works like this. However, unlike a regular storefront a legally binding contract to complete the transaction exists between the seller and buyer once the auction ends or an offer is accepted. pgjackson appears to have completely ignored that part of eBay that all sellers and buyers agreed to when they decided to use it. One could argue that good customer service includes following the policies of the marketplace. It goes both ways.

It was good enough for the seller. So please wag your finger at someone else.

[FACE PALM!!!!!!]

Dont know why i didn't think of this!!! I was talking with a friend about the situation and he says, "the frames are black and you like them, why not just get new lenses and be able to rock them both?!"

DUH....problem solved