I'm doing a time trial today with my team. I crashed my road bike, so I'm busting out the track bike. I've entered under the name "Schwinn ****ing Armstrong."

My question is, how should I finish?

a) the classic.



b) new school.



c) Keep it classy

Do you have aero bars? front brake? How big a gear are you going to run?

front + rear brakes.

No-handed skid across the finish line.

Poppin' a wheelie while affecting the tough guy persona of Kelly Leaks from the original Bad News Bears like you know you're the best out there but the years of bullying abuse from your father and mother's drug use have left you distanced and hard-skinned, unable to love or feel the love of others yet deep inside you want to be known, you treat women as playthings yet deep inside you question your own sexuality...

i like this more subdued rejoice

Whatever. Just as long as you're popping a huge ***** as you cross the line.

How do you even know you won a TT unless you're last?

I'll be running 50X16. It'll be perfect gearing except for the *****ing hill halfway through. I'm going to do a no handed skid through the finish while pullin' the big Tom Boonen.

No aero bars. I'll be running b123s. Just my Pista Concept, no modifications. It's just an in team competition, I'm just trying to find a way to get my ass stomped in style.

Sounds like you've got everything under control.

totally.

you could freak em out if you gave a little:

Wow, now that's leaning on that ****.

Oh yeah I forgot to mention that I'm doing this TT on 45 minutes sleep last night. Lab Reports, Homework, and Grading Papers = major suck.

leather helmets = the dealznit

1N. Finish of a Race
1N1. Judging.
The finish of a race shall be judged when the front tire first penetrates the imaginary vertical plane passing through the leading edge of the finish line.

...which is a damn shame.

I'd rock the skid across the line if you now you can lay it down sweet, if not, just throw up the dual shocker

When I fiirst saw that picture of Boonen winning as a thumbnail, I prayed he was double barrelling shockers. I was so bummed when it turned out to be peace signs.

+1, WITH a huge ***** at the end.

They where two's for his second consecutive win.

Alright so this is how it went down:

Started and was hummin', the legs felt good. It was only about a 10 mile individual time trial, so I just kinda got on it. I've never done any road racing or TT'ing, so I was pleasantly surprised. I cruised along and with the 50X16 gear spinning probably 100 rpm the entire time until hittin the hill. The hill bogged me wayyyyy down and I lost a lot of time there. Then I missed the turnaroun point and went about 2 miles past it. Finally turned around knowing I'd gone way too far. Get back and my time was 9 minutes higher than the heat of the pack. It ****ing sucked having that slow of a time. Then we finally did the math and found I went an average speed of 22.5 mph for the 14 miles I did, and applying that to the ten miles I should have raced, I had a time that was in the top third of the riders. That **** felt great, can't wait to do it again next week and actually take the right turnaround and distance. I'm pleased I did that well on 45 minutes of sleep.

nice! better luck next time...

Isn't that "C"?