I had a couple kids ride up to me today and flip out over my bike.

"Hey!! That thing can go backwards, huh?!"

..."Yeah, I guess."

"Do it!!"

..."I don't have skills."

"That thing must be fast, it's one of those ROAD bikes! Hey, how fast does it go?!"

"Umm... as fast as I spin my legs."

I just thought it was hilarious, they were like 12 or 13, on some decent entry-level kids bikes I guess, totally into my bike. They challenged me to a race...

I work/go to school at a college. While riding to work in the summer, I had a tour guide for freshman stop his speech and literally scream "Nice Fixed Gear". I, surprised and having everyone looking at me, just kinda let out an awkward.."uh.. thanks" and rode off.

It was flattering though.

"thanks for running a red light!", yelled a fat guy as he was crossing an intersection at like 6 AM in downtown denver. No cars to be seen anywhere, yet he was still perturbed that I was cruising through a red light. I didn't even ride close to the guy.

Thats ****ing hilarious jerrymcdougal.

Yesterday I was riding up to the video store and some dude pulled up to me on a serious motorcycle at a stop light. Thing was huge and probably went 2000 mph. Anyway:

Motorcycle: Hey...

Me: Hey.

Motor: Thats one of them older bikes eh?

Me: Yea. It is an '82.

Motor: How can you balance like that? (I was trackstanding)

Me: Oh you know...

Motor: Yea ok. So you wanna race?

Me:... Huh...? I'll lose.

Motor: What? You are on a motorcyle! You couldn't lose to me when I am on a bike.
Light changes and the dudes starts riding away.

I still have no idea what he was talking about.

mini-van following me on a very narrow country road for what seemed like forever, when the road finally widened the lady in the passenger seat said as her ?husband? slowly drove next to me, "Don't you ever stop pedalling? We've been behind you forever and you never stop!"

"M'am, it's a fixed gear...I can't stop."

"Do you want some help?"

I just laughed and shook my head no..."Um...nope, I think I got it."

they drove off as confused as I must have looked.

I like it when I am asked how fast my bike is and in response I drop it on the ground and say it falls pretty fast oh well an the person who asked is totally confused

Cool! singlespeed!

me: Nope, it's fixed.....no coasting...

Hey you dropped your wallet!

I don't carry one!

oh....uh.. ::middle finger::

"What are you crazy?" Some suit who was doing the pedestrian shuffle. I wasn't even going fast.

made me laugh out loud

I get more comments about my road bike.

random person: "Man that is a nice bike. Carbon Fiber?"
me: "Yeah, it is alright. It would be nicer if I didn't crack my frame. I guess that makes me stupid for commuting on a carbon fiber bike. I need a good steel bike"
rp: "My friend has a carbon fiber bike."
me: "Yeah there are a lot of people that like to waist money."
rp: "???"

The frame on my bike sucks, but I got it for next to nothing. Now I need to buy another frame. Cracked it after 3 months, but I cannot return it. Hopefully, I can get a good deal on steel.

Most common comment I get is:

Them: It's illegal to run a red light.

Me: But, is it unlawful???

Dude, they're probably cyclists themselves.

You guys all have fun anecdotes. Mine are more like:

2 guys in car driving next to me while I am in bike lane: "buy a car, you ******!"

me to people riding straight at me on a one-way: "hey, this is a one way street, you know."
them: "shove that helmet up your ass, you anti-modern prick!"

I'm not even sure what that last one means.

I had someone coming at me the wrong way down a one way street. They noticed and backed up.
Car next to me: "that would not have ended nicely."
Me: It happens all the time.
Them: Really?
Me: Yep.

i rode through a red light not too fast even, a lady was crossing the crosswalk. i said excuse me, she said "screw you."

I get "Screw you!" and "******!" when I blow through green lights that every pedestrian has decided are no longer valid. **** em. A loud "No Brakes!" "Yo!" or "Excuse me!" if I'm feeling snarky usually gets their attention.

motorist:SIDEWALK!
me:you're ugly!

i did one time have two fine ladies i met at a party about a week prior drive up next to me and try to get my phone number while i was riding, in fairly heavy traffic.

People yelling "Can you give me a ride" but I guess that's more double entendre than funny anecdote but it happens a lot and I want to punch them all in the face everytime I hear it.

I like to scream obscure STDs at 'em. SCABIES!!! really gets people's attention

I've had a couple fun ones...

Nice summer night riding on a well-lit street:
Jock Jams In Car With Ugly Girls: "Hey tree hugger!!"
me: "uhhhhhhhh"
JJICWUG: "YOU ******!"
me: "uhhhhhhhh" so I catch up to them at the next light and flip the driver off less than a foot away from the car window. haha

Next:
Riding home from the park, nice summer night again:
Dudes in cars do a U-Turn at a light where I crossed perpendicular to them,
Drunk or ********: "Hey are you having a good bike ride uhhuuhhhuhh"
Me: "Sure am wang."
DoR: "****en bike ride mother ****en **** you ****ing **** ****er" as they drive off
Me: "Get a job ******-nozzle!"

Next:
Riding home from work:
Commuter guy stops at red light where I saw a gap and shot through.
I hear a "Never run red! Never run red! Never run RED!"
I yell "Sorry papa!"

good times

Jeep Brahs: Bike guy!
Me: Got any weed!

Bar letting out: Lance!

Me slowly rolling thru an intersection...
pedestrian: Hey, the light is red !
me: I see you've been studying your colors, great job!

I also find that random nonsense works well and confuses the hell out of people.
pedestrian: watch where you're going!
me: I prefer blueberry pancakes on saturday morning!
pedestrian: what????
me: I love you too!

plus one on random nonsense. i like "oh god, are you serious?" and "thanks, i'll have that checked out."

only memorable one i've heard is "how do u stop that thing?"