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Man, I hate crappy pumps.

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Singlespeed & Fixed Gear "I still feel that variable gears are only for people over forty-five. Isn't it better to triumph by the strength of your muscles than by the artifice of a derailer? We are getting soft...As for me, give me a fixed gear!"-- Henri Desgrange (31 January 1865 - 16 August 1940)

Man, I hate crappy pumps.

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Old 05-07-08, 06:06 PM
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Man, I hate crappy pumps.

Dear CrankBrothers,

When I was on the market for a small hand held pump to bring along on rides, I came across the Crank Brothers Power Pump Alloy on a popular cycling equipment website. Its compact design, sleek black finish, and affordable price lured me into ordering my very own Power Pump Alloy. Upon delivery, I was quite impressed with this Power Pump Alloy. Not only did it come with a patch kit, the anodized, knurled handle looked and felt great in my hands. It even came with a nifty mounting unit for my bike! What a happy, satisfied customer I was.
Though the pump looked and felt nice, upon first use I noted that it was absolutely impossible to exceed 85 PSI. Since this was an emergency pump and not my main piece, I was able to accept and overlook this slight flaw, but a Power(ful) Pump it is not. I will refer to it as the Pump Alloy from here on out. I had used the pump a few times to pump up flat tires, but ever since my stand up pump at home gave up the ghost I had been using the Pump Alloy to pump up my tires on a daily basis. Riding around on 85 PSI felt very sluggish and greatly (negatively) impacted my bicycles handling, but it kept me going until I had access to a pump at a friends house or bike shop. I was still satisfied with the purchase of my Power Pump alloy.
Unfortunately, today I learned that the Pump Alloy is actually not a pump at all. When I went to pump up my tires with the Pump Alloy, it appears to have decided that it no longer wants to be a functioning pump. I unscrewed the valve stem, inserted the stem into the correct side like I always do, and locked it in place. I then proceeded to pump. It did everything it was supposed to aside from pump my tires up, making it a pump no longer. It makes a very "airy" noise, but no air is actually pumped into the inner tube. As you can imagine this is very upsetting, as I liked my (Power) Pump Alloy, but now I'm stuck at home with a flat tire and no way to get to the bike store. I depended on this Power Pump, but it has let me down in a huge way.
Since this "Power Pump Alloy" isn't powerful, nor is it much of a pump, may I suggest shortening the name from "Power Pump Alloy" to simply "Alloy"? I feel that this would be a much more accurate name, and may boost sales slightly. If you choose to do this, please get back to me so we can start to discuss an intellectual property licensing agreement. I wont ask for much in return, just a pump that actually works. Maybe a set of those neat anodized quick release skewers you guys make too, but a nice pump would be good enough. I look forward to your response.


Thank you for your time,
-xxxxx x. xxxxxxx
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Old 05-07-08, 06:10 PM
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And why cant I indent my paragraphs :[
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Old 05-07-08, 06:15 PM
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Road morph mini. It will reach 160, I've pumped to 120 easily. It comes with a frame mount, gauge and all. If I didn't own a floor pump it would be my floor pump. I've also beat the crap outta mine, it sat at the bottom of my bag, under books, 12 packs, hammers, crashes, sub zero weather, for the last year and its just scuffed up. Should it ever break I'd go get it again.
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Old 05-07-08, 09:25 PM
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Old 05-07-08, 10:13 PM
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Real pumps don't have pump in the name: Topeak Road Morph G.
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Old 05-07-08, 10:17 PM
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Im getting kind of tired. I thought the post title referred to "Puppy Cramps"
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Old 05-08-08, 07:06 AM
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I think that letter is hilarious. Anxious to find out what the reaction will be...
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Old 05-08-08, 08:39 AM
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I hope they actually reply, I spent $16 hard earned dollars on that piece of crap. I'm going to go get one of those Topeak joints today though so I shouldn't need it. I'll post their reply if I get one.
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Old 05-08-08, 10:43 AM
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