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Ultraheavy Touring & Altitudes

Old 12-28-15, 01:11 PM
  #1  
jamawani 
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Ultraheavy Touring & Altitudes

My feelings are hurt. Really hurt. Really, really hurt.
Do you know that there is not a single post here at BikeForums on "Ultraheavy Touring"? It seems to me that everybody is saying, "I don't like UH bike touring because you think you can take it all with you and your a-- is too big, too."

Which is something I have never witnessed because it takes me forever to get from one place to another.

What I have witnessed is a general condescending attitude towards people who are interested in UH touring.

Recently someone asked about taking along a piano and somebody else snarkily said, "Why not make it a grand piano?"

But hey - - taking along a piano has its advantages. It make take a long time to get up to the pass summit, but man, when you come down, you'd better watch out. Especially when the piano starts to get in front of you. Those UL tourers don't stand a chance.

In another thread where people were discussing all sorts of gear calculations I simply said "It's nice when I have to get off my bike and push the piano, especially in mountains." I had replies like "The UH evangelists are getting fat, fast" and "UH isn't the be all end all of touring" and "would you take that piano on a round the world tour through remote areas?" I made no attempt to convert anyone, or talk down to anyone who packs differently than me.

So I can't comment on what you've personally experienced over the years. I know that when I am playing the piano in the middle of the Mojave Desert or at the top of Hoosier Pass everybody stops and dumps tons of money into my hat. Plus, they give me beer.

YMMV.
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Old 12-28-15, 01:18 PM
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It's a joke, but it is true too. Touring heavy is looked down though a lot of people do it.
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Old 12-28-15, 01:21 PM
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The guy who rolls into camp with a full keg on the rack is often the most popular... just sayin.
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Old 12-28-15, 01:23 PM
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Heck I'd go touring with @jamawani; the OP has style and isn't wasting negative energy bashing anyone who might tour differently,
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Old 12-28-15, 01:26 PM
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When trying to decide whether to bash people or piano keys always consider: WWBD (what would Beethoven do).
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Old 12-28-15, 01:26 PM
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No, please let's not spend the winter turning the touring forum into the 41.
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Old 12-28-15, 01:30 PM
  #7  
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On a short trip last week in the Keys, I blew past a couple at maybe 12 mph in a 25-30 mph headwind. They were going half that speed. An hour later they pulled into the campsite next to mine at Bahia Honda SP. The guy was smart, in that he had his wife pulling a kid carrier for two crammed full of gear. He was riding with just two small panniers. Got to chatting with them later, and the guy pulled out a hatchet (not in a threatening manner, of course). What do those things weigh? I'd guess a good 5 pounds. WTH are you going to use a hatchet for in the Keys? Chopping up iguanas? They had a huge tent, camping stove and who knows what else?

That is the epitome of UH touring.
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Old 12-28-15, 01:30 PM
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Ultra-heavy touring so 2015.
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Old 12-28-15, 01:31 PM
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Originally Posted by jamawani View Post
But hey - - taking along a piano has its advantages. It make take a long time to get up to the pass summit, but man, when you come down, you'd better watch out. Especially when the piano starts to get in front of you. Those UL tourers don't stand a chance.
If Chuck Jones (creator of the Roadrunner and Wile E. Coyote) could read this he would crack a big smile.
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Old 12-28-15, 01:33 PM
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Originally Posted by chasm54 View Post
No, please let's not spend the winter turning the touring forum into the 41.
As I noted a while back in a post in Addiction, there is something awry in the world when there are more locked threads on the front page of the Touring forum than on the front page of the 41.
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Old 12-28-15, 01:54 PM
  #11  
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Silly things people do are funny. UH and UL are in my opinion bordering on silly. Why go to so much trouble to carry as little as possible, and why haul tons of stuff you don't need? Have at it, but there is nothing much to be gained by going to extremes. Makes for great entertainment for the rest of us.
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Old 12-28-15, 02:06 PM
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Old 12-28-15, 02:10 PM
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A visit to the Cycling Dutch Girl blog would be instructive. I saw her riding through Port Townsend, WA. and I made a slightly smartass remark about how much she was carrying on her bike. But, she's ridden all over the world, and done quite well apparently.
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Old 12-28-15, 02:40 PM
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I love Ultra Heavy tourers, some of my best friends are Ultra Heavy tourers, because if I need a tool or something unusual to get me by, they've likely got it. Besides, I rarely have to worry about getting dropped or left behind when riding with UH tourers, especially if there's a lot of climbing. Love 'em

Last edited by robow; 12-28-15 at 05:36 PM.
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Old 12-28-15, 02:42 PM
  #15  
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It is Called Expedition Bicycle Touring=Heavy Bicycle Touring
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Old 12-28-15, 02:42 PM
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You need one of them old fashioned traveling typewriters and an 1800's steamer trunk thats UH.... Don't give the hipsters any ideas.
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Old 12-28-15, 02:48 PM
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Originally Posted by twalls View Post
A visit to the Cycling Dutch Girl blog would be instructive.
Wow! What a great blog.
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Old 12-28-15, 02:51 PM
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Expedition Bicycle Touring but this bike is a Homeless guy in San Diego, CA
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Last edited by Biketouringhobo; 12-28-15 at 02:53 PM. Reason: new words
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Old 12-28-15, 02:59 PM
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Originally Posted by indyfabz View Post
As I noted a while back in a post in Addiction, there is something awry in the world when there are more locked threads on the front page of the Touring forum than on the front page of the 41.
+ 1.
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Old 12-28-15, 03:02 PM
  #20  
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You gotta be comfortable on tour. Where's the remote?

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Old 12-28-15, 03:27 PM
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Originally Posted by tyrion View Post
Wow! What a great blog.
What a sense of entitlement. Like where she breaks into a cabin and uses the microwave and writes "I hoped nobody would mind".
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Old 12-28-15, 05:18 PM
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Originally Posted by jamawani View Post
My feelings are hurt. Really hurt. Really, really hurt.
Do you know that there is not a single post here at BikeForums on "Ultraheavy Touring"? It seems to me that everybody is saying, "I don't like UH bike touring because you think you can take it all with you and your a-- is too big, too."

Which is something I have never witnessed because it takes me forever to get from one place to another.

What I have witnessed is a general condescending attitude towards people who are interested in UH touring.

Recently someone asked about taking along a piano and somebody else snarkily said, "Why not make it a grand piano?"

But hey - - taking along a piano has its advantages. It make take a long time to get up to the pass summit, but man, when you come down, you'd better watch out. Especially when the piano starts to get in front of you. Those UL tourers don't stand a chance.

In another thread where people were discussing all sorts of gear calculations I simply said "It's nice when I have to get off my bike and push the piano, especially in mountains." I had replies like "The UH evangelists are getting fat, fast" and "UH isn't the be all end all of touring" and "would you take that piano on a round the world tour through remote areas?" I made no attempt to convert anyone, or talk down to anyone who packs differently than me.

So I can't comment on what you've personally experienced over the years. I know that when I am playing the piano in the middle of the Mojave Desert or at the top of Hoosier Pass everybody stops and dumps tons of money into my hat. Plus, they give me beer.

YMMV.
This post immediately made me think of this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zV9GMODm0SI
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Old 12-28-15, 05:30 PM
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I'm planning a trip where I will take my anvil and blacksmith equipment and earn my way across the country shoeing horses. I'm thinking I should get a triple and maybe on of those new cassettes with the 41 tooth cog.
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Old 12-28-15, 08:12 PM
  #24  
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Originally Posted by andr0id View Post
I'm planning a trip where I will take my anvil and blacksmith equipment and earn my way across the country shoeing horses. I'm thinking I should get a triple and maybe on of those new cassettes with the 41 tooth cog.
I don't know if you're being facetious but the reality is you could. Bicycles are amazing machines where you're able to trade time for distance. Gear down and take your time and you can move the world, to coin a phrase


I've made this point before but there's a huge difference between touring where a bicycle bares the weight, and backpacking where your body does. The longer you take to cover the same distance backpacking the more it "hurts", taking longer touring has no such trade-off. This means that for bicycle touring the weight factor means little, unless you're interested in big distance or fast times.
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Old 12-28-15, 09:00 PM
  #25  
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Whatever makes people happy is ok with me. Never a negative word about it. And like was said, the guy with the keg is the most popular!
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