The bike cops around Chicago are pretty funny, too. I always wondered how they're trained. If someone is running on foot, are they going to try to make a jump from the pedals to tackle them? Are they supposed to take aim at a criminal while hammering after him? Given how badly they ride (and how woefully out of shape most of them around here are) I would be terrified if one ever drew a gun while in the saddle. When you can barely hold your line because you're riding so slowly (in a huge gear for no reason), why would anyone in the right mind trust you with a firearm?

Be afraid. Be very afraid.