You might consider using lubrication instead of spandex. Spandex wouldn't be the ticket for school or work, so consider bringing a small tube of vasaline or Avon "skin so soft" with you. Applied to the tender areas, either of these will reduce rawness and chaffing. You might also consider shaving the areas where chaffing is most problematic. The hair there increases the tendency to chaff. Finally, cleanliness is, indeed, next to Godliness when it comes to sensitive areas. Wear clean underwear every day (and consider some skin-fitting cycling underwear). This will allow you to wear "normal" outerwear and still have a layer of protection between your skin and the fricition of rough clothes and the cycle seat.