Rule #1 The stoker is always right!
Rule #2 See rule #1

Wherever your marriage is headed, you'll get there faster on a tandem.

The above are old tandem slogans because they're true! However, to answer your questions, we have been riding together for about 15 years. After several on-the-road rides we were both having a good time, and it has only gotten better. However, I do have to say that it is still a work in progress.

As DubT said, "communicate". In addition, here is some good reading material:

http://sheldonbrown.com/tandem.html
http://www.tandemcycleworks.com/firs...irst_ride.html
http://www.gtgtandems.com/tech/propmethod.html
http://www.rodbikes.com/articles/web...ngstarted.html

Good luck, and HAVE FUN!