I leave my bike locked in a panic room i built in m,my house. the walls are reinforced concrete six inches thick, with a steel security door. I have a retina-scan lock and a time-lock which kicks in if someone tries to open the door by bypassing the retina scan.

My bike will never be stolen.

Nor will it ever be ridden.

Now, at last, i don't fear bike theft.

But then ... my bike is a 22-year-old BSO from Sears, with more rust than paint, no tires, tacoed wheels, and no seat, and the chain is rusted solid. But at least I am not afraid it will be stolen.

If some low life is going to steal my bike, the S.O.B. is going to have to work to get it.