I dunno if it's going to make any difference, but anyway:

1) the butt pain from normal bicycles has to do with the limitations of saddle design, which is related to the overall riding position of the bicycle. So you won't get away from the butt pain until you stop buying bikes with normal seats. And that isn't exactly cheap to do.

2) there are ergo (noseless) saddles made for normal bicycles, but they have the problem of your butt sliding forward off the seat. So to prevent that, you have to adjust your riding position so that you are leaning forward more, which causes more hand pressure and neck strain. So in a very real way, these ergo seats don't really fix the problem so much as they move the butt pain to your hands and neck. You might like any of them, but many of these designs have been around for decades and despite the ongoing problem of bicycle-butt-pain, they have never become popular.

3) if you want a basically-upright bicycle that is more comfortable, that rides efficiently over long distances and that still looks and rides mostly normal, then get a RANS crank-forward bike. The cheapest one is around $1700 now, but they still sell frame sets I think. There are other bikes that are kinda-sorta like that and cost a lot less, but they do not ride nearly as well.

4) if you want the absolute best riding comfort and don't care about being looked at, get a recumbent. Most of the pain you get when riding a normal bike, doesn't really happen on a recumbent. And recumbent riding shorts don't have any padding at all in them. You don't get Shermer's neck if you don't ride Shermer's bike.