You're joking, right? Or you've missed the point.
I've been riding since 1960 and started riding with clubs in 1973, so I think I have a pretty good understanding of how gearing works.
I'm pretty sure I don't have a first generation Stumpjumper, since the fork crown is wrong, but I think I could have a second generation. I'm now on my fourth hardtail and my first full suspension. I've lost track of how many road bikes, gravel bikes, hybrids, etc., I've gone through, but do know I have four custom steel frames, starting with an REW Reynolds back in the mid seventies.
I've been around the block more than once.