Let me tell you what I did yesterday. We’ve had some crappy cold weather here the past few days, but yesterday, and today too, are glorious. I took the day off work and loaded the car with all my tools and repair stand and went down to work to give all the employees free bike tune ups. I want to get more people on their bikes and save them a few bucks, and the closest bike shop is run by an 80 year old fat assed harridan that treats her guys like **** so I definitely wanted to take money out of her pocket anyway I could, Village Cycle on Wells, my brothers. I’m fixing all the bikes, grooving to the tunes I brought (Can You Dig It boxed set, pricey but freaking great). Ironically, where I set up shop was were the smokers come on their breaks, certainly the Moody Bible Freaks would say that’s where the important work gets done. Anyhoo, a bike messenger stops for a delivery in the building and my stand is free so I motion him over, toss her in the stand, and do a quick check while he’s dropping off his paper, how he stopped with those brakes I'll never know. I figure this is the kind of guy I want reading “fixed gear” so when he comes back I give him a copy and quite spontaneously I tell him to spread the word over the radio that I’m here for another hour giving free tune ups. Word goes out and soon I’ve got a steady stream of guys coming for check ups. Quick once over, copy of “fixed gear” and they’re off. It was a blast working on the different bikes. One guy comes up and his checking me out, saying he put motor oil on his chain last night and needed something better. Tri-Flow or Phil’s Tenacious I asked, got him set and then I handed him a copy of the book and he said he already had one, now how the hell did he get a copy so fast? And come to think of it, his chain looked brand new. Made me wonder, that’s all. Damn near all the messengers had the bags with the seat belt clip, can’t remember the name. A woman came by and saw the excitement and, rather brashly, asked if I could look at her bikes, let me say she wasn’t Catholic, she wasn't Jewish, she wasn’t Muslim, and she wasn’t Hindu, she believed only in herself, if you catch my drift. I told her to bring them over. She brought two new, hardly ridden mountain bikes. The bikes were two years old, I’d come to find out and I can guaran-f’ing-tee I ride more in a week than the total miles on both those bikes. I’m sorry, but this pisses me off, two great bikes that don’t get used, and never will. She wanted them ready yesterday and was irritated that I was giving priority to the messengers, but I was cool and told her to come back at two thirty. I’m doing this all for free for the employees and the messengers so when woman off the street stops by, I’m not expecting any cash instead I rehearsed my line for her when she came back which went like this “for you there’s no charge today, but by accepting these bikes you are now obligated to do something nice for a stranger before the sun sets and when they thank you tell them to do something nice for someone else” She comes back right on time and loads up her bikes and I’m waiting for my intro, waiting for her to say how much do I owe you. I could have waited all day because nothing was coming. Not even a thank you. All day I’m fixing bikes for working people, trying to save them money and this woman, in expensive clothes, expensive bikes, expensive address and she showed no sign of gratitude whatsoever. Hey, I did it for free, I don’t care about the money, but her, with her sense of entitlement, broke the chain of goodwill I was making, a chance for the world to be just a little better. I’d like to be a better person, more able to let stuff like this go, but I’m not Mother Theresa, and I know this woman’s bikes intimately, and if I ever see them parked on the street I’m going to remove the valve cores, and if I see her riding...we’ll, I’ll think of something. This part of the day ends here, but there’s another, major part I left out until I get the pictures so I can post them. I will not allow this woman to have the last word. For part two, if any of you internet jockeys can find an article on the Lost Boys of Sudan, please post it here.