Let me be frank (you can be anyone you want). I'm gonna do the unpopular thing and call you a wussy. You complained about how hard it was, how hot it was, the sun, the hills, yada, yada, then you say you'd be down with it if you only had a shower. I say bull. You can clean up in a sink just as well as you can in a shower (I do all the time). If you think the ride is too hard or the heat is too much for you...great, just admit it, don't try to find other excuses.
My best advice...start riding more recreationally and get yourself in a little better shape...then tackle your commute again, if you choose to, when you can do the distance in the same conditions. Hang out here, and you'll learn some tips to make the ride and the logistics easier. You ain't gotta be a commuter to hang out with us.
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"Let us hope our weapons are never needed --but do not forget what the common people knew when they demanded the Bill of Rights: An armed citizenry is the first defense, the best defense, and the final defense against tyranny. If guns are outlawed, only the government will have guns. Only the police, the secret police, the military, the hired servants of our rulers. Only the government -- and a few outlaws. I intend to be among the outlaws" - Edward Abbey