[rant]

Hey there fellow bikers... I'm a recent lurker on the board and a relatively new cyclist. Just about 10 minutes ago I had my first encounter with a clueless $sswipe driver. I need to get this off my chest, so here's what happened...

I'm getting back from a short cruise up and down the local boardwalk. Residential neighborhood with very narrow streets. There is a bunch of construction going on around here, so there are lots of contractor pickups and such parked all around. I'm approaching a 2 way stop intersection with the stop signs being for the other direction. There is a big pickup parked near the intersection with some construction dude leaning into the back getting some equipment out from the street side. So I slow down to about 10mph as I approach. Naturally, I give a quick glance over my left shoulder to see if I can take the lane and to give the parked car plenty of space. This is where it gets good...

There is a BIG white Chevy Suburban behind me, about 4-5 car lenghts back... but he's not moving faster than me, so I take the lane to pass the parked car... remember, the roads are VERY narrow... accounting for the parked cars, the Chevy IS about as wide as the remainder of the road. So instead of just waiting for me to pass the parked car, the jerk in the Chevy ACCELERATES and passes me as I'm passing the parked pickup. I get squeezed between the two huge cars, a 10,000 ton monster on my left moving now about 20mph and a parked pickup on my right. I was so shocked that the Chevy was trying to PASS me on a narrow road when I clearly was IN THE LANE, I instinctively tried to veer to the right... but didn't make it in time and my left handlebar put a nice 3 foot long scratch down the Chevy's right panel. I kept my balance and kept riding, making a right turn at the intersection. The Chevy went straight.

About a block away the Chevy pulls up next to me and the driver yells to me, "HEY, did you just HIT MY CAR BACK THERE?"

There was zero damage to my bike and I'm laughing at this idiot inside, so I just smile and say, "Kind of a tight squeeze there, don't ya think?"

"That's not what I asked," he spits. "I asked if you hit my car."

"Actually, I think it was you that passed me on the left and squeezed me between you and the parked pickup."

"My wife says she heard you hit me." His wife is in the back seat... He pulls over and gets out of the car. Walks around to the right side and startes surveying for damage.

"Your wife heard my handlebar hitting your car as you accelerated to pass me. I was in front of you and you passed me on a stretch of road that was too narrow..."

Then he goes on some rant about how I have to "share the road" when I'm on a bike. That set me off completely.

"Hey @sshole," I say. "You're absolutely right I have to share the road... but that goes for you too. You have NO right of way to come crashing by me on the left on a narrow street when there isn't sufficient space to make a safe pass. You wouldn't have tried to pass me there if I were in a car, so just because I'm on a bike, you think you can just push me to the side? You admit that I was in FRONT of you and you passed me on the left. That makes it YOUR responsibility to ensure there is room to make the pass, not mine... I was CLEARLY in the lane when you came roaring up behind me, what was I supposed to do, slam into the parked car?"

That got him tounge-tied... "Um... ahh... er.... welll... I just want to be sure there's no damage." The funniest part is, he was so flustered, he DIDN'T SEE THE SCRATCH!!! LOL!!!

"Dude, if there was any damage," I say, not pointing out the scratch to him, "IT WOULD BE YOUR FAULT."

"I don't want to talk about it, there's no damage..."

I've got him on the run now, "Oh, sure, NOW you don't want to talk about it... is that because you know you were WRONG? Try having a little courtesy and respect of others... and don't blame your mistakes on those around you. Great example to your family... :rolling eyes:"

He runs around to get back in his car.

"Oh sure, just hop in and run away. What, don't I at least get an appology for you HITTING ME and then chasing me down and trying to BLAME ME FOR IT? Are you man enough you admit when you f#ck up?"

As he peals out (I didn't know a Suburban could do that) he flips the one-finger salute out the window.

The best part is... he's gonna find that scratch later... hahahahahahahaha!!!!

BTW, for the record... I'm not using this as an anti-SUV rant. I actually own an SUV myself... this is an anti-sh*t-for-brains rant.

[/rant]

People never cease to amaze me. Congrats on tongue-tying the moron, though.

Well done. You are my hero of the day. Keep up the good work.


Cheers

That is awesome!!! I don't mean it's awesome about him squeezing you, but at least this is another time that the cyclist caused more damage as in my first accident!

My husband had an encounter with a guy on a freeway (of sorts). It is legal for us to ride on this two lane "freeway" out in the country. My husband was going at a pretty good clip when his wheel caught a rock which rocketed off his wheel hitting a passing car's side window. There was also a motorcycle close to this car. When the window broke the driver pulled over thinking that the glass had hit my husband on his bike. My husband rode up beside the car. My husband was going to tell the guy that he thought that the rock bounced off his bike wheel and broke his window but before he could start explaining, the guy got out of his car and started screaming at my husband that it wasn't legal for him to be on that road and he wasn't responsible for the glass hitting my husband etc etc. Apparently my husband couldn't get in a word edgewise. So he said he thought "Ok jerk, I won't tell you" and my husband got back on his bike and rode away. My husband was willing to pay for the damage but that's what you get for shooting your mouth off.

I'd love to have seen the look on the guys face when he realized his Suburban had a nice new scratch. No matter how faint, his eyes will go right to it every time he looks at that side of the car.

If only the scratch could have majically spelled out @sshole. This is why I think we need to change the "share the road" signs to "at least 3 feet between cyclists and cars". You are also my hero for the night.

Why pay for any damage? Anything that's on the road and thrown by any vehicles tires is not the responsibility of the vehicle operator. If your husband's tire threw a stone, it's not up to him to do anything about it. If something falls off his bike/car and damages another vehicle, he's responsible.

I am astounded that the jerk actually listened to reason. Most of the jerks I run into have some sort of block up that prevents any rationality from reaching what little "thinking processes" they might have.

I think cars nowadays are so effortless at handling the huge forces involved in driving that drivers always think in financial terms. I remember once being a passenger in a car when it was hit on the side at the rear and spun round by a moron. As soon as we stopped spinning, the fear left us and we were instantly thinking of the money it'd cost to fix the car, how long it'd be off the road and whether we'd need to get a taxi home. People in cars forget that with a cyclist, the fear is always for your own body and/or life. Most cyclists aren't going to have a sufficiently huge repair job or bill to be off the road for very long and it's relatively common to have a spare bike. So you get a situation in which a car-driver whose come very close to killing someone only thinks of the hassle of going to a garage to fix a small scratch in their paintwork. They have to be reminded at all times what they're travelling around in.

Well done - I only think of the right thing to say when the $sswipe driver has just left.

That is very true, Smaug you must be a natural negotiator, or a very large scary lookin dude It also is amazing that you managed to stay on your bike after your bars were hit, good job. Funny how the jerk felt save enough to flip you off when inside his steal armour.