Neil_B

Since the OP brought up the subject, I've known people who have left the Clyde forum. There are many reasons a person may stop posting. I suggest that we assume these folks are all rational adults and capable of making their own choices about where to post and what to post, and that those reasons might be other than the tone - or what a now former Facebook friend called the "tenure" - of a few posts here.

mcrow

That may be true but I don't believe a stranger over the internet can effectively accomplish that. Most of the time tough love has to come from someone who has a personal connection to them, not just some people over the internet that they don't know. There are just some methods of helping that don't go over well over the internet and tough love is one of them, IMO. The exception may be if you grew particularly close to someone via regular interaction but to this point I have seen few instances that would qualify on these forums. I know that sometimes people meet in person or interact via PMs and emails or they are also active with each other on facebook or whatever but I think that is more the rarity on forums.

PhotoJoe 

I can see both sides of this. To some, it's "tough love". To others, that same post can be rude and insensitive. There may be a time that a PM would be a better tool than a public post.

CbadRider

The bickering and ankle-biting needs to stop. Those who can't or won't control themselves will be asked to leave the thread.

Thanks for your cooperation.

magohn

Agreed. Lets keep it 'general'.

Almost 30 posts in approx 1 hour tells us somethings not right on the Clyde forums.

goldfinch

This is a forum that is owned by some entity and is moderated. There isn't free speech on this forum. We as members can express what we like and don't like and the moderators and owners will decide where the lines will be drawn. I am in the group that sees things as Tom expressed in his two posts.

Acquaspin

Agree.

We exchange opinions, not attitudes(there's another place, a couple clicks away, that better suits that purpose). Good bikers let their legs do the talking, good posters let the content of their post do the talking. The passive/aggressive, tough love, strawman arguments, etc do not add strength to the argument, I'd argue it's actually the opposite. The fact that there's a thread about it, and a few threads closed lately is enough of a red flag that something is happening.

A good heads up, let's try to keep this place as we all knew it.

Juan Foote

Thanks for this post OP. I had considered a similar post, but think that your wording and handling of it were much better than mine would have been. This situation needs to be addressed, the tenure of posts that led to this were just this side of flaming and trolling and was very surprised not to see some action taken. Put simply, let us support each other even with our faults, in a place where people need that the most.

magohn

Mr. Beanz

Glad you found some worth in our PM's Allen. One thing you might look into is the fact that you might be too hard on yourself and your feelings. It's ok to be fat but fit is better, so if you head in that direction, good for you. If you backslide like we all do, that's ok too. Just keep your goal of being fit in mind, that's all anyone can ask really since that is the number one step. When you really want to do it, you'll do it, it won't be the personal attacks that motivate you.

Heck, if you ever come out this way, we'll do a ride then we'll have a pizza eating contest, I bet I win!

Allen55

Ive seen your rides and your hills. LOL. I would NEED pizza to get through some of those. LOL

magohn

On this one I must definitely disagree. You may be 'King of the Mountains' but there is no doubt I am 'King of the Deep Dish'

MileHighMark

Let's all try to follow Bill & Ted's advice:

Be excellent to each other.

Mr. Beanz

Nope, we put the pizza on the other side. Why do you think I get over the mountains?

Mr. Beanz

Sounds like a challenge and believe me, when challenged by another forum member, I tend to perform at my best bwahahaha!

magohn

BTW - My original post starts "My fellow clydes" - why not Athenas? I have yet to see an Athena be unjustly negative or unsupportive to another member on the forum.

Makes you think doesn't it ?

Hill-Pumper

Ah yes, testosterone does get the better of us sometimes. That said I'm all for playing nice, until someone says anything bad to my Athena, then the gloves come off. See, testosterone again.

Beachgrad05

Somehow I must have missed something recently.

I try not to judge tho I might throw out advice or an opinion and boy I hope I am doing so respectfully. If I'm not...please PM me and let me know.

I do not want this forum to devolve...I love all my Clyde/Athena brethren

volosong

Wow, I didn't know that I was that dense. What are all you "guys" talking about? I've found this sub-forum to be very supportive and it is one that I always check, second if not first.

PhotoJoe 

There was a recent thread that had some open and rather blunt conversation. It's closed and will soon disappear into the great abyss.

adrien

I'm horribly confused.

This is a good, supportive and generally kind place. That is as it should be. Many have commented on that -- myself included -- and it probably needs attention to be preserved, be it through posting or some self-policing.

Others above have noted that in some cases a little tough love is in fact the best thing, and I don't think anyone is saying don't do that. If I personally had truly heard and listened to tough love, I would have carried less weight for less long. That probably would have been a good thing. Then the question becomes whether an internet forum would have made a difference to me. Um, no. But that's me.

But I may have missed something. It may be that the threads in question are not only locked but gone. It's hard to sign up to not o something when you don't know what the something is. I'm not sure what the harshness was that led to this thread. In the absence of that understanding, it's difficult to know. And it's difficult to know, going forward, what the group has decided is appropriate and what is not.

Are specifics -- like updated "before posting" rules -- something we could generate out of this?

mcrow

I think the treatment of one particular poster was what triggered this but it was more the the straw than anvil that broke the camels back.

There has been a small group of people that have the tendency to be overly blunt to the point of rudeness and then claim "tough love" which really doesn't work over the internet with strangers. I'm not sure that the intent was to tear people down but maybe people don't realize the being a hardass or using tough love over the internet generally doesn't work to motivate people.

magohn

Its hard to give examples without linking specifically, which is something I don't want to do, but in my IMHO the responses to certain threads were above what should be deemed acceptable and directed at member(s) merely asking for support and advice. It was/is becoming a pattern.

Lets move onwards and upwards. Thanks to everyone for the comments and support.

Here's to better days...

Seattle Forrest

Black wallnut 

Methinks it is because girls grow up and mature but some boys only get bigger. Either that or this forum has no reflection to reality. I was going to reply with quote to a couple of posts but CbadRider's post talked me out of that. Tone is something that is sometimes hard to perceive and is also often misinterpreted in forums. There are several members here that I noticed right out of the gate have a style that i do not care for. I try to look the other way and just ignore their posts. I try to be supportive and helpful and if I think my post will be viewed or can be viewed otherwise I'll not click on the submit button. I also hope someone finds encouragement in my posts. If we each could only adopt the same this would not be an issue. Understand we have a broad base of readers who bring all sorts of baggage to the forum. Thick skin helps sometimes but IMHO there is never any reason to call out another in a forum. Thanks to the Mods for enforcing that!