LMAO

I think they had how to do that in popular mechanics a few months back.

Yea, the tractor bit is the best. It had me laughing out loud here at work.

But seriously; I say we take up a collection and get that MTB rider on a decent road bike and then watch him blow Mr. 600Durace into the weeds.

I ride a single speed. Does that mean I have just one watt... or what? Anyway, I'm no slouch, but I've been surprised on more than one occasion by day laborers riding 35 lb Walmart mountain bikes in denim jackets and work boots. Sure, I might have been toward the end of a 40 mile ride, but these guys can throw down some watts of their own. Perhaps thats because they ride because they have to, not because they want to.

DanO

excellent.

You need to warn me to turn away from the monitor if I have coffee in my mouth ! I'm going to get busted for laughing too. I really am LOL.

So I turned up my lights to 400 watts......... and I put the hammer down..............mechBgon was close behind, he was drafting in the electromagnetic field. All of a sudden slvoid went to high beam and came from behind at the last second..........he was running TWO Nightrider tailights ! ! The reverse magnetic field in his tailight cables swung him around like a track racer. He dropped us both......the spirit of Ringo lives on.

Next week....... mech brings the big guns ! The new tailight!

I just want to know how they accurately measure it.

My little converter here says 440watts is about .59 horsepower. But where did he get the figure in the first place?

Well I suppose you're right, but I don't know about OTB in a 5 race. I don't really train with watts, though I have had a fitness test. My max wattage at exhaustion was like 420 or something, so 430 didn't sound bad to me - but the test started at 100 watts and went up 20 watts every minute, so by the time I was a max wattage I had been over threshold for 6 minutes. I mean, I'm a cat 3 with the points to cat up to 2 so I realize among racers he isn't like Lance but those numbers aren't that bad if he kept going 290 for a lot longer, anyway - but at that point he had dusted the guy.

Everybody just loves to pick on R600DA. I personally think it is annoying as heck when other people start racing you when you're just doing your thing. So that is why I took his side.

From here: https://www.cycleops.com/products/powertappro.htm

Flythebike, that would indicate to me that your LT watts are somewhere in the mid 300's, consistent with an average sized Cat 3. I'd bet your 30 second critical power would be more like 600 to 700 watts. Way above R600's 290 for 5 minutes, and 430 for 30 seconds.

See https://www.cyclingpeakssoftware.com/...profile_v4.gif

Yeah, R600's numbers are not very impressive at all. I am just a cat 4 yet my threshold (30 minutes) was 297 last time I was checked. Holding 450 watts for 30 seconds is not all that difficult either. I see numbers that high for a couple of minutes at a time during climbs. During sprints they are much, much higher.

If you are going to brag at least do it with some impressive superman type numbers.

All I do:

1) shift my butt to the back of the saddle
2) shift my pelvis forward.
3) spin the 44-11 on my MTB
4) get out my sindproof lighter
5) put lighter to butt
6) fart and ignite
7) 15 seconds later look back at the ppor chump who's now on fire, running around and screaming "AHHH MY D***S ON FIRE, MY D***S ON FIRE AHHHHHHH!!!!!"

...Taco Bell, it's how chumps are burned.

Oh yea...well my Dad rides faster than your Dad!

To me R600DuraAce posts before and now have always been satirical. For that reason I chuckle at them and don't take them seriously. Take a minute and think about his user name. He has included in his name a reference to an elite race gearing for bicycles, how pompous. But its humorous.

Kind of like the movie Dr. Strangelove where Kubrick made us laugh in the same way with the character Generral Jack D. Ripper:

He said war was too important to be left to the generals. When he said that, 50 years ago, he might have been right. But today, war is too important to be left to politicians. They have neither the time, the training, nor the inclination for strategic thought. I can no longer sit back and allow Communist infiltration, Communist indoctrination, Communist subversion and the international Communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids.

42% slope 28 MPH no wind

www.analyticcycling.com

Frontal Area 0.50 m2
Coefficient Wind Drag 0.50 dimensionless
Air Density 1.226 kg/m3
Weight 75.0 kg
Coefficient of Rolling 0.004 dimensionless
Grade 0.420 decimal
Wind Resistance 23.9 kg m/s2
Rolling Resistance 2.9 kg m/s2
Slope Force 308.9 kg m/s2
Cadence 100. rev/min
Crank Length 170. mm
Pedal Speed 1.78 m/s
Average Pedal Force 2357.8 kg m/s2
Effective Pedaling Range 70. degree
Effective Pedal Force 6062.9 kg m/s2
Speed 12.50 m/s
Power 4197.5 watts

This is a cautionary tale! How far into cycling can you get before you pass through the Membrane of Beatitude and become a tool in "team kit" racing a mountain bike on the most-populated MUP in the United States? We should look for the warning signs! Just today, I was thinking that I'd like to know just how fast I'm going up First Avenue, as I pass or run alongside the taxicabs. Now, after reading this, I'm not so interested. I'm convinced that the cyclocomputer is the gateway drug to tooldom. Computer users, beware.
As for the tractor, I know that guy. Shortly after your "race," fmw, the guy had a nervous breakdown. Now he sits on a bench in front of city hall, whittling a replica of an Easton carbon fork and muttering, "Wattage, wattage, wattage...." Sometimes I give him the half of the sandwich I didn't finish. He is a shell of a man.

Well, I do have to agree with R600 on one tiny point. It is annoying to find some clown who speeds up to pass you and having passed you, slows down; and does it repeatedly. Cyclists like that are morons.

It's worse on a regular commute where you meet this moron day after day. I'm not really into racing in the morning, and after several days of this behavior and showing such them that yes, I am consistently faster than him and hoping that he will eventually just quit trying to force me to follow him, I just find an alternate route because clearly, he is not learning, and I don't wish to contribute to whatever pathetic dialog he has going in his head.

I live on a farm and actually own a John Deere. I drop tractors all the time around here on the roads. I exaggerated the numbers just a tad, but the story wan't too far from the truth.

I just realize we've been duped by some computer nerd sitting behind a desk making up stories, arg, I fall for it every time...

R600, I get the feeling you're trying to compenisate for something...

He has small breasts and the pushups aren't working.

Coming home to federation space via DS9 on impulse power just running some diagnostics on the warp core. An hour earlier I was enjoying a deliscious klingon dinner with the high council. I was carrying a fresh load of dylithium crystals. I'll be taking shore leave tomorrow at planitia utopia while the enterprise is in space dock having the warp nacelles overhauled. All of a sudden navigation sensors pick up this cargo hauler blowing by at warp one and drops to impulse right in front of me, I mean this bucket of bolts was leaking antimatter all over the place yet the phred piloting it thought he was in a klingon bird of prey or a romulan warbird! mind you this is in a charted flight corridor so you just don't drop in and out of warp. Fine, I let him go ahead, so he scanned me and slowed down and forced me to take evasive maneouvers and go around, he punched it up to warp one and did it again. This went on a few more times untill I realised that mine is bigger than his so I called "shields up, red alert" and all hands went to battle stations. I took out his rear shield generators with the first phaser shot and locked on a spread of photon torpedos, he opened a communication channel and begged for mercy, I put it up on the viever and gave him THE LOOK, I fired the torpedos and blew by him at warp 9 as he was vaporised.

Ready for some terrawattage? at impulse I was at 0.5 terrawatt, at top speed I was doing warp 9.1 (about 1600 times the speed of light) at 5 million terrawatts. I knew when the torpedos hit he wouldn't be able to get back on my nacelles and would blow up. I scanned back and not surprisingly he was just a cloud of dust. I hope the cargo he was carrying wasn't too valuable.

That would be quite humorous. I'm sure we'd have one to 2 forceful submissions a day to thatl.

Ditto.

Thanks for sharing the diagram.

Actually when they tested me my LT was either 280 or 300. It was in October of last year, so at the end of a long season full of (35) races, therefore you might be right as it has likely improved after a winter of some rest, and more training. But, they commented that that likely showed why I tend to finish well: I could ride above threshold for twice as long as most people. My sprint tends to be rather long as well. I say this mainly by way of encouraging people to take these kinds of tests, they really can tell you things about yourself that you didn't know, especially your training zones. Now when I'm in a tough finale, I know other people are having more trouble than I am, even if it hurts me a lot too. I'll probably re-test pretty soon, at least again at the end of this season, and it will be super-interesting to compare the difference.

As far as R600DA goes, perhaps he hasn't reached 'critical mass' through his training yet. Therefore his race results aren't anything to crow about, so it makes him feel good to crush people who challenge him in other venues. If it makes him feel good and he doesn't hurt anybody, the worst thing that can happen is he'll have an overdeveloped ego.

I've won three races out of my last 15 starts or so, going back to my last cat 4 race, but the stronger I get at this level, the more I realize what a big pond it is. The higher you go the more guys there are who are good at what you are good at, and the more breaks there are and tactics - so while I can dust almost anybody out there on the bike trail, I am so aware that there are many, many elite guys who could steal my lunch. R600DA should keep it in perspective!

lol, hilarious thread, best i've read in a while