I've ridden into the back of a parked car - although in my defence it was a dead end street and they were parked on the wrong side of the road - and just watched me ride straight into them. I'd been looking at my front wheel or the road or something and caught sight just before I hit and was going slowly so no damage... to the brand new car they were reviewing for a magazine or newspaper.

Also had my wife point to something across the road... and rode into a support guy for a power pole. It was anchored between the sidewalk and the bike path - and had a yellow plastic shroud on it. I've noticed they've actually moved it now - its off the side of both paths so I don't think I was the only one to do that.

Also crashed while trying to switch hands on the handle bars - right on left, left on right. Of course when I did it I was riding behind my sister and managed to take both of us out.

https://www.bikeforums.net/singlespeed-fixed-gear/514470-ms-paint-your-mishaps.html

I've not been home to the UK for years but Tesco now sells bike stuff!? What are they changing into some sort of Walmart-type enterprise now? Please tell me Sainsbury's ain't going the same way?

It ended with me finally agreeing to get into the the ambulance...

...when the paramedic that found me lying by the side of the road pointed out that I had no idea what day it was, or what year it was.

It was 1999, for the record.

I was about 13 years old and I had a single speed coaster brake hunk o junk. For whatever reason I was pulling a skateboard behind me on about 15' of rope. I happened to turn around and look just as the skateboard went under the wheel of a large 4X4. The skateboard stopped, the bike stopped, I didn't stop. When I finally got off the ground and went inside to get fixed up my mother had to use a pair of pliers to remove a rock from my shin bone. I still have the scar almost 30 years later.

Okay I have mentioned this before, but never in detail... My first new bike ever was a beautiful Long Haul Trucker, which I have decked out with a tubus rear rack and fender etc. I loved that bike.
Anyway heading to my summer job my trusty truck broke down 1000 miles from my final destination so when I finally arrived a few days late my bike was my only transportation that summer. No sweat, small hippie town (ithaca, ny), bike friendly i am set.
fast forward to the end of the summer. I am biking 1 mile for wing night with the crew before we all go our separate ways a few days later. Its still light, i am doing fine. I crest a small hill and gun it to get out of the way of the traffic that has followed me over the two lane bridge. I miss judge the angle into the parking lot, and had developed a BAD habit of riding the flats of my drops far too much. I take the turn far to shallow and cant hit the brakes before I hit the curb. T Bone the curb, do an end over the bike at speed (15-20mph) hit the STOP sign planted firmly in the parking lot island, knocking it over about 20% (it was made out of 2 inch box aluminum) Break the top tube of my LHT into, bend the fork. Need stiches in my back (from the stop sign, no to mention the bruise across the entire length of my back) and leg (gouged by the bar end shifter)
My friends who were pulling in at the other end of the parking lot says they never saw it, but instead heard it.

and that ladies and gentlemen is why my new bike has moustache bars

Ya know when the story starts like that it isn't going to end well!

Well, I was pedaling through the intersection on a green light, taking the lane because I turn left just past there onto the bike lane. Everything was cool until I saw a neighbor in his car waiting at the red light. He recognized me and waved, and had the strangest expression on his face - a mix of shock and horror. Just then, I looked down and realized I was riding buck, stark, birthday-suit naked!

...oh wait, that was just a dream the other night...

I was getting some fresh veggies from the farmers market on my way home from work. I stopped at crosswalk and forgot which foot was unclipped and fell over very close to a drink machine. I was so close to the drink machine that I couldn't get from under my bike and I had to scoot down about 5 feet to free. It was at a crowded intersection and I could here the locals laughing.

The one and only time I tried BMX racing (14 years old) was way embarassing. I couldn't even get over the first hill/ jump. Every time, I just bounced off the bike. After trying about 3 times, I decided that my butt was bruised enough for me to call it quits.

When I was in my early thirties I had a few years of being single. I started riding, got really into it, and decided to get a 'nice' mountain bike. I went to my LBS and scored a Gary Fischer Hoo Koo E Koo and that became my first clipless bike.

I rode it once alone. The next day was a riding date with a gal I had been out with only once before. We decided to ride up one of the canyons and have a picnic lunch at the summit. Sounds great! We park at the base of the trail, unload, and get ready. The first part is pretty steep, with a lot of loose gravel that lasts about 150 yards or so and it gets nice once you get past that part. We take off, I am in a low gear, moving slowly, then my back tire spins out on a patch of loose gravel. My forward momentum stops, I am not real good with the clipless yet, I fall over and splat.

I got up laughing as there wasn't much else to do at that point. Only about 30 people saw it happen. It all worked out though as she was cool about it and I am guessing I had a much better lunch than I was originally going to have.

None of mine can match my friend Jeremy.

We lived up the street from the city beach. During the off season, the city would take the raft out of the water and put it up on blocks in the parking lot.

We all had our bmx type bikes and decided to built a ramp to ride down off the raft. Once we got it set up we were all goofing around and Jeremy decided he wanted to be the first one to ride down the ramp. He got some decent speed up and was too late to react to us yelling to him the ramp was on the other side.

My best bud in high school had a Schwinn Varisty with stem shifters, and we being the cool guys we were had figured out a way to take tunes with us when we were riding, he carried a large 12x3x6 inch 9 transistor radio, slung on a chain over his back, with the D batteries that sucker probably weighed 10LBS he was nearly at his growth of 6" 2" not heavy but between bike, radio, and him a pretty decent amount of weight coming at you. Out riding one day he is flying down hills in a local park when an old beater car comes around the curve opposite and on the narrow one lane park road they meet! Bike stops, car stops, he goes airborn, catches the stem shifter along his shin as he goes by, the radio of course comes off and takes out the windshield of the car in passing...the shifter basically seperated his calf from his shin for a good 12 inches, took 57 stitsches to reattach things and he spent the rest of the summer on crutches while we rebulit the front of the bike, but the cool part was the insurance company totalled the car!!! We still ride him over being the only cyclist we know who totalled a car nearly 40 years later.

Winner!

I did something similar....although I wasn't messing with the stem. I was going down a hill at top speed (20 or so, but it felt much faster) and went into the grass to (Huffy mountain bike from Walmart or BJs) make the turn and hit a clump of grass that turned the front wheel 90 degrees. I basically rolled over the front and at some point let go of the handlebars and the bike ended up in the street about 15-20 feet away. Friend behind me slammed on his brakes and told me he was following along and then saw just a cloud of dust....a few scraps, sore ego (among other things).

Until riding out here in CA, that was the last time I wore a helmet when riding my bike. I felt it made me to reckless; of course, I won't go more than 10 mph without a helmet. Go figure....

Forgot helmet for BMX race, borrowed helmet slighlty too big,got to first corner in 3rd place,could not see corner as helmet over eyes, striaght over massive banked corner and down the over side,how uninjured never know.

This past summer, I was coming to my destination -- a little luncheonette -- and a bee got in my helmet. I panicked and ripped the helmet off and took my eyes off the road. I slammed into the back of a minivan. Oof! Oddly, I wasn't hurt at all, just embarrassed at my absent-mindedness, but no one witnessed it. I went into the luncheonette and told the owner what just happened. It turns out it was her minivan! But I didn't dent it or anything, and she was more concerned about me than her minivan. What a sweet woman she is!