All my life at least riding life been riding trails and single track, but never was good at it. I am one of the slow people. I can hammer well in fitness on open trails, like dirt roads, back roads and even good at road riding. but when it comes to technical single track, i am a chicken and have little kids pass me

is there anyway, any tips out there. Anything to help someone learn to gain confidence and coordination for single track riding. I tend to go off trail, ride into trees at times.

I am open to some suggestions. as i figure not over the hill yet/ (mid 30s) and like to know if possible to become more of an expert at single track . thanks techniques or web sites i am open to better on this thanks
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I am no expert, but what I try to do is keep centered on the bike and always looks where I want to go. If you stare at obstacles or off the trail, you will surely end up there.

I'm a relative noob, but it does sound like you're not scanning the trail far ahead enough, and focusing on the obstacles directly in front of you too much. Changes my life every time I get out on the trail and get my head properly into that space where I'm rolling over what I've already scanned seconds ago, whilst scanning the trail ahead. And of course, the whole, "look where you want to go" mantra never fails...

Also, a huge leg up for me was taking a MTB skills class. My next ride after the "beginner" class I took was like night and day as far as confidence. If there's one available near you, give it a try.
This is a GREAT book too, that I find very helpful:
Mastering Mountain Bike Skills - 2nd Edition: Brian Lopes, Lee McCormack: 9780736083713: Amazon.com: Books

Oh, and I just started getting really into this at 53--so don't worry so much about being "over the hill"

I'm in the same boat. I recently took private lessons with a local pro. He is way cheaper than a skills class and I got personalized attention. I am still practicing the skills we went over, but I feel better on the bike than I did before. Now I have to work on my fitness too. MTB is different than road biking when it comes to fitness. I can pound out miles on the road, but rarely do I get my heart rate up to 200+. On big climbs when on the MTB I hit 210 all the time.

I actually took a course 2 years ago (after riding MTB's since the mid 80's!) - best money spent!!! Simple advice rings true... on singletrack focus ahead... if turning to the right, actually swing your head to the right (not too quickly) following the trail, the bike will follow. Basically your body follows your head and where it goes. Once I started doing this, my speed on singletrack picked way up. Also learn to scan ahead ot pick the best line (although on singletrack sometimes the best line is the only line). At times I am still out of control but that's the fun of it. For technical areas, best advise, repetition. Do the difficult spot over and over and over until you are confident of the bike's ability (notice i said bike not you. Once you realize the bike can do just about anything - you will loosen up and be more confident) to get over just about anything. Remember speed is your friend and carry lots of bandaids!