Go Back  Bike Forums > Bike Forums > Touring
Reload this Page >

A Beginners Guide to Cycle Touring: How to prepare

Notices
Touring Have a dream to ride a bike across your state, across the country, or around the world? Self-contained or fully supported? Trade ideas, adventures, and more in our bicycle touring forum.

A Beginners Guide to Cycle Touring: How to prepare

Old 02-01-11, 06:59 PM
  #1  
Senior Member
Thread Starter
 
downtube42's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 3,707

Bikes: Trek Domane SL6 Gen 3, Soma Fog Cutter, Focus Mares AL, Detroit Bikes Sparrow FG, Volae Team, Nimbus MUni

Mentioned: 10 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 825 Post(s)
Liked 1,900 Times in 995 Posts
A Beginners Guide to Cycle Touring: How to prepare

I apologize if this is a repost - I didn't see it anywhere. hilarious

https://cyclingtrip.com/sections/guide/index.htm
downtube42 is offline  
Old 02-01-11, 08:44 PM
  #2  
Doesn't ride enough
 
Lamabb's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Carmel, NY
Posts: 350

Bikes: 2010 Cannondale Caad9 5 / 2010 Surly Long Haul Trucker/ 2013 Orbea Orca Bli2 / 2011 Specialized Rock Hopper

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Eh, it sounds like whoever wrote this had a bad experience touring... I get it is intended to be funny but it's a little ridiculous even for a joke.
Lamabb is offline  
Old 02-01-11, 09:16 PM
  #3  
djb
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Montreal Canada
Posts: 12,969
Mentioned: 33 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 2639 Post(s)
Liked 884 Times in 732 Posts
I laughed
djb is offline  
Old 02-01-11, 11:37 PM
  #4  
Senior Member
 
Doug64's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Oregon
Posts: 6,459
Mentioned: 31 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1164 Post(s)
Liked 788 Times in 417 Posts
me too
Doug64 is offline  
Old 02-02-11, 04:01 AM
  #5  
Formerly Known as Newbie
 
Juha's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Helsinki, Finland
Posts: 6,250
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 2 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 4 Times in 3 Posts
Several of the points seemed familiar to me.

I've seen a similar description about sailing, but it was considerably shorter:

1. Take all the cash you can get (beg, borrow, steal, whatever), in paper money.
2. Stand in cold shower with your clothes on. One by one, rip the notes into pulp.
__________________
To err is human. To moo is bovine.

Who is this General Failure anyway, and why is he reading my drive?


Become a Registered Member in Bike Forums
Community guidelines

Last edited by Juha; 02-02-11 at 04:09 AM.
Juha is offline  
Old 02-02-11, 04:30 AM
  #6  
Senior Member
 
Tansy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 211

Bikes: Novara Safari(2009)

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Sounds angry and bitter to me.
Tansy is offline  
Old 02-02-11, 05:09 AM
  #7  
2 Fat 2 Furious
 
contango's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: England
Posts: 3,996

Bikes: 2009 Specialized Rockhopper Comp Disc, 2009 Specialized Tricross Sport RIP

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 6 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 2 Times in 1 Post
I had a good chuckle at it - even though the only thing I've done that loosely qualifies as a "tour" was a 2-day jaunt with a night in a B&B with luxuries like a hot shower, by the end of the first day I could appreciate most of it.
contango is offline  
Old 02-02-11, 08:59 AM
  #8  
Wheezy Rider
 
Connell's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: 8,750'
Posts: 293
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 9 Post(s)
Liked 1 Time in 1 Post
Made me laff. Especially Step 6.

Think of a song from the 1980's that you really hated. Buy the CD and play 20 seconds of that song over and over and over for about 6 hours.

I'm a "no iPod while I'm riding" kinda guy, but there have been times on tour when I've had to put it on, just to clear my head of an earworm.
Connell is offline  
Old 02-02-11, 09:01 AM
  #9  
Senior Member
 
indyfabz's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 38,105
Mentioned: 209 Post(s)
Tagged: 1 Thread(s)
Quoted: 17742 Post(s)
Liked 14,076 Times in 6,682 Posts
No laughs here. The intro gives a glimpse into his cycling mindset.

One thing I found interesting is that he left the (now closed) Bunk House Inn in Whitefish on June 12, 1999 and headed towards the Roosville border crossing just north of Eureka. Our cross country group came down from the Eureka area (Rexford) and stayed at the Bunnk House on June 13th. Missed him by a day.
indyfabz is online now  
Old 02-02-11, 09:15 AM
  #10  
djb
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Montreal Canada
Posts: 12,969
Mentioned: 33 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 2639 Post(s)
Liked 884 Times in 732 Posts
Originally Posted by Tansy
Sounds angry and bitter to me.
while I laughed, I still wondered why the fellow went to all that time to make such a negative "joke". Oh well, hope he got his poop sorted out, after all this was 11 years ago.....
djb is offline  
Old 02-02-11, 01:40 PM
  #11  
Senior Member
 
marmot's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Ottawa
Posts: 439

Bikes: Kona Dew Drop, Specialized Expedition Sport

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Aw, hell. You have to be ready to laugh at yourself. I could write something similar about canoe tripping, touring in an antique roadster, or restoring an off-the-grid cabin. Doesn't mean I don't love it and wouldn't jump at the chance to do it again. I laughed, heartily.
BTW, "Ah'm hungra like the wooooooolf..."
marmot is offline  
Old 02-02-11, 01:46 PM
  #12  
Senior Member
 
BengeBoy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Seattle, Washington, USA
Posts: 6,955

Bikes: 2009 Chris Boedeker custom; 2007 Bill Davidson custom; 2021 Bill Davidson custom gravel bike; 2022 Specialized Turbo Vado e-bike

Mentioned: 2 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 4 Post(s)
Liked 9 Times in 8 Posts
I liked it.
BengeBoy is offline  
Old 02-02-11, 03:54 PM
  #13  
No Heroes
 
EvoFX's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Bay Area, Ca / KÝbenhavn, DK
Posts: 74

Bikes: Bianchi Eros//2007 Fuji Touring

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
two thumbs up for this. feels like a our first week going over the sierras into nevada, snow, rain wind...wooo
EvoFX is offline  
Old 02-02-11, 06:42 PM
  #14  
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Chapala, Mexico
Posts: 304

Bikes: Habanero Titanium

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Ah, c'mon, it was funny.

The only thing I want to know is why the "Wicked Witch of the West" music flits through my head when I'm pedaling hard (duh da-duh da duuuuh duh, duh da duh da duh....aaaaargh)
dengidog is offline  
Old 02-02-11, 07:45 PM
  #15  
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Along the Rivers of Pittsburgh
Posts: 1,255

Bikes: 2011 Novara Forza Hybrid, 2005 Trek 820, 1989 Cannondale SR500 Black Lightning, 1975 Mundo Cycles Caloi Racer

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 258 Post(s)
Liked 291 Times in 157 Posts
The sitting on a softball line made my LOL. Oh, and "clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right, here I am, stuck in the middle with you..."
Altair 4 is offline  
Old 02-03-11, 10:17 AM
  #16  
ghost on a machine
 
Bike Hermit's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Idaho
Posts: 216

Bikes: Rivendell A. Homer Hilsen, Serotta Colorado Legend TG, Rivendell Roadeo, Surly Cross Check, Surly Big Dummy

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 7 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 1 Time in 1 Post
While there is some discomfort involved with traveling on a bike, it just makes one appreciate the small things and simple comforts more. Not everybody gets it. A friend of mine who doesn't do bike touring calls stealth camping "hiding in the woods".
Bike Hermit is offline  
Old 02-03-11, 10:34 AM
  #17  
Senior Member
 
zeppinger's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Chicago, IL
Posts: 2,014

Bikes: Giant FCR3, Surly LHT

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 19 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 4 Times in 4 Posts
Tl;dr
zeppinger is offline  
Old 02-03-11, 11:32 AM
  #18  
Senior Member
 
Chuckie J.'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 297
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 3 Post(s)
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
I actually read this guy's tour journal many years ago and it stays in my mind as one of the finest ones I've seen. He starts out one way and ends transformed. That's a great story, every time. Its LONG so you're not going to knock it out in a single sitting or even a couple days.

Which brings me to journals-- I actually like when the writer complains about stuff. A tour isn't all roses and beautiful vistas. There IS some real suffering happening and I want to hear about that suffering and how it transforms us. Anyone know of some other good tour journals? I'd like to read them.
Chuckie J. is offline  
Old 02-03-11, 12:07 PM
  #19  
Senior Member
 
indyfabz's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 38,105
Mentioned: 209 Post(s)
Tagged: 1 Thread(s)
Quoted: 17742 Post(s)
Liked 14,076 Times in 6,682 Posts
To clarify, I thought it was a good concept. I am the first one to laugh at myself. But I just don't find most of his analogies funny/amusing.
indyfabz is online now  
Old 02-03-11, 12:38 PM
  #20  
Velocipedic Practitioner
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 488

Bikes: Specialized Sirrus, Bianchi Volpe, Trek 5000, Santana Arriva tandem, Pashley Sovereign, among others

Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Well, that was a few minutes of my life I'll never get back. So awful I gave up after Step 8.
PurpleK is offline  
Old 02-03-11, 12:44 PM
  #21  
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,268
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
His journal is really quite good. Better than most by far.
positron is offline  
Old 02-03-11, 02:26 PM
  #22  
Stoker's View
 
seenloitering's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 107
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
I can't believe I'm actually doing this.

What makes the article funny is that an activity like bicycle touring, whose primary aim is enjoyment, necessarily entails so much suffering. We call this "irony". Irony is a common feature of humour. There is nothing "bitter" or "negative" about this piece at all; rather, it is a satirical exaggeration of an irony inherent to bicycle touring. If one were actually bitter or negatively inclined toward touring, it would be impossible to even write this piece; you see, enjoyment is as necessary a support for the central irony of this piece as suffering is. The joke, literally, is the recommendation of suffering for the purpose of enjoyment.

Now I have to take a shower. Explaining humour is a dirty business.
seenloitering is offline  
Old 02-03-11, 06:45 PM
  #23  
Senior Member
Thread Starter
 
downtube42's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 3,707

Bikes: Trek Domane SL6 Gen 3, Soma Fog Cutter, Focus Mares AL, Detroit Bikes Sparrow FG, Volae Team, Nimbus MUni

Mentioned: 10 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 825 Post(s)
Liked 1,900 Times in 995 Posts
Originally Posted by seenloitering
I can't believe I'm actually doing this.

What makes the article funny is that an activity like bicycle touring, whose primary aim is enjoyment, necessarily entails so much suffering. We call this "irony". Irony is a common feature of humour. There is nothing "bitter" or "negative" about this piece at all; rather, it is a satirical exaggeration of an irony inherent to bicycle touring. If one were actually bitter or negatively inclined toward touring, it would be impossible to even write this piece; you see, enjoyment is as necessary a support for the central irony of this piece as suffering is. The joke, literally, is the recommendation of suffering for the purpose of enjoyment.

Now I have to take a shower. Explaining humour is a dirty business.
satirical exaggeration of an irony inherent to bicycle touring

wut?
downtube42 is offline  
Old 02-03-11, 07:24 PM
  #24  
Walmart bike rider
 
gpsblake's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 2,117
Mentioned: 2 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 127 Post(s)
Liked 29 Times in 24 Posts
There are tons of guides out there for touring, but few of them actually talk about the biggest part of touring.

The mental aspect of it. Weekend trips help with your gear and such, but do little for your mental aspect.

The best way to handle the mental aspect, do a weekend trip in the worst possible weather (cold/rain/wind). See if you want to continue after the 3rd day. Touring isn't always fun folks.
gpsblake is offline  
Old 02-03-11, 07:52 PM
  #25  
Senior Member
 
Chuckie J.'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 297
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 3 Post(s)
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
This is satire, folks. The writer is describing their seemingly irrational love for touring (and proof that reading isn't as simple as identifying words.)
Chuckie J. is offline  

Thread Tools
Search this Thread

Contact Us - Archive - Advertising - Cookie Policy - Privacy Statement - Terms of Service - Do Not Sell or Share My Personal Information -

Copyright © 2023 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved. Use of this site indicates your consent to the Terms of Use.