I was commuting to work this morning, trying to turn into my office. Very grey day, light misty rain, morning rush hour. Not easy to see. At least half of the drivers haven't turned on their headlights. (I honestly wonder if most drivers think is slows their engine down or something. Completely shocked by how many people drive around at dawn/dusk with no lights on).

There is a car coming out of the parking lot one up from my turn. I have to cross a busy four lane road, which has a divider, then turn left and head up a bit before turning into my office. This car is facing me from across the four lanes. No lights, no signal from the driver. "Oh she must be going straight." As I turned left in front of her I see she has only one hand on the wheel, the other clutching a mug. Great. I told her to put her lights on.

As I'm turning into my office she drives by and yells out the window, "Have a better attitude!"

Lady, I'd LOVE to have a better attitude. But when many drivers have no lights on and it's raining, most have either coffee or are texting, or both, most think signals are optional, how in the heck is a cyclist supposed to have a better attitude?

I know I live in a car-central culture. I know I'm a 2nd or 3rd class road user. I know this is an uphill battle. But what drives me crazy is that operating a deadly vehicle is seen as a casual right available to all with very few consequences if you operate incorrectly. Have a better attitude? Three cyclists have been killed in my city in the past few weeks. All by drivers at fault (running stop signs, etc.) I have close run-ins too often, no matter how bright I am, how many lights, and how careful I am being. How do you deal with dark cars and no lights on in the rain when you can't see them? Last week I was crossing a main road in the crossing area, had stopped and looked both ways...when I heard a car coming. What?! It was completely dark, they didn't have their lights on. If I hadn't heard it, who knows what would have happened.

I've since gotten a helmet-mounted light, instead of just on my bars. But I can't get over people casually endangering my life because they are too careless, reckless or stupid to use signals, put their lights on in the rain, and respect cyclists on the road. And then they try to tell me....Attitude is everything! Yeah right. If even 75% of drivers operated their vehicles properly, my attitude would be awesome

I know road and commuter cyclists might as well be aliens from another planet to most Americans...but love that they have zero ability to understand why I might be frustrated with their driving behavior.

Oh well, ride safely and don't let the bonkers cagers get ya down.

Ya know... I really agree with this.

What really irritates me are the motorists that don't bother cleaning/clearing their windows before setting off. Around here we don't tend to have terrible blinding rains... but we do get coastal fog and high enough humidity that it often deposits a layer of dew or a thin layer of dropplets on the various widows of a car. I am not talking ice or snow, or anything that really takes effort to remove... nope, simple condensed moisture. Yet I see folks hitting the road without clearing that stuff from their windows... Not even using the wiper/washer. They choose to "drive blind," somehow thinking they will feel their way down the road.

I just don't get it. Paper towels cost pennies. Old T shirts are free. A decent squeegee is only a few bucks... and yet people choose to "drive blind."

Before I started bike commuting, I never really turned my lights on until they were required for me to see. If I couldn't see the outline from my lights, there was no reason to have them on. With that said, I WOULD turn the parking lights on when it was dawn or dusk.

Now-a-day it's a little less of a problem. I believe all cars are required to have daytime running lights so as old cars are phased out, this problem will become non-existent.

Most people are oblivious when they're driving. They're half asleep with coffee in one hand listening to the news or their favorite song with the other half of their brain.

It seems to me that D.R.L.s are no longer a feature on new cars. They seemed quite popular a few years back, but now I see lots of new-ish cars without lights on. I too drove differently when I was mainly a car user and not a cyclist. I understand my perspective is different as now mainly a cyclist/cyclo commuter. But, I don't think it's asking too much (I'd like dedicated bike lanes across the U.S., pipe dream though) to turn your lights on in the rain (state law!) or to use a signal when entering a major roadway or, heck, when leaving a parking spot. If you don't have your lights on and have tinted windows a cyclist can't see you in there and has no clue you're pulling out. Especially if it's Prius!

genec - Yeah, I'm not asking for much. I'd LOVE to, but I'm just asking that you put in a little effort to piloting your deadly machine. Do what you want in your house or backyard, but when you go out in public you gotta get it together and obey the laws and the unwritten laws too, such as common decency. If you can't do that, stay home and entertain yourself. And if you can't be bothered to twist your wrist a bit, or flick your wrist, then don't drive. Walk everywhere. Or get a burro and ride that.

But, to be told to "have a better attitude" by someone breaking the law x2 is a bit laughable, but mostly infuriating. Argh.

Additional lighting up high is a good move on your part. I started doing that a little over 2 years ago and have noticed fewer drivers cutting me off, etc. As always, I make a plea to buy an AirZound (u pump it) airhorn. And finally, about the "better attitude". Whether or not you could have been more diplomatic, I don't know; but you were correct to bring the driver's low visibility to her attention. Preventing hurt feelings are less important than preventing hurt bodies, or dead bodies. As far as getting over "obliviots" (thanks Brock Yeats)...DON'T! A certain adversarial attitude and suspicion of other's driving skills will keep you alive. That being said...growing up in Chicago, I have seen that a misplaced comment or angry gesture could get you shot, run-over or both.

An airhorn is a great idea. I wear a hi viz jacket, run two lights on my bars, one on my helmet flashing forwards, one on back flashing in rear, one on seat post, one on bike rack. I ride avidly, long road rides on the weekends, commuting on weekdays. I'm a pretty good bike handler and began cycling in downtown Washington, DC, so have spent a decade now dealing with urban drivers.

Yes, I know some folks don't like to have their misdeeds pointed out. I used to engage a lot more drivers in an angry fashion when they screwed up. Now I try to be a lot more peaceful about it. But...after the 50th car on your commute that doesn't have lights on, doesn't signal...you just tend to get angry. It's not some fun option I'm asking you to exercise, I'm asking that you follow the law. And, to think about more than just if you can see. Just because you can see doesn't mean others can see you. And, why do most other drivers have lights on? And, why does that crazy man cycling in the rain...have 15 lights flashing on his bike/body? I just can't understand how they don't get the picture to turn theirs on.

I do try and not enrage drivers, but after awhile, when it's your life and well-being, it's hard just to stay calm. That's what non-cyclists don't get. You aren't going to dent my fender, you're going to dent my skull. That gets me a bit more angry with reckless drivers.

And yes, light on my helmet is great. In just a few weeks I've noticed more drivers seeing me/slowing down.

I lied, DRLS are NOT required in the US. They're permitted, not required.

OP, While I don't ride in the rain. In the major vein of your question, I do approach that stupidity in another way. While I have told my father for me personally, I refuse to be lit up like a blasted Christmas tree to satisfy his concerns and the dumb helmet rear light he bought me is a piece of junk because it can't be seen in the sun. When it comes to drivers' like the one you encountered, while I would stop them briefly to remind them that other motorists' may not be able to see them. So, Regardless of whether a cyclist can, or can't, see them which won't get them killed. They should think about the fact that, if another motorist doesn't see them for the exact same reason. There next stop won't be 'Home, Sweet, Home'. It will be a funeral home.

My mother -- who does insurance for a living -- sent me an ultra-high-vis vest a few months ago and I in my totally biased, anecdotal opinion, think drivers have been slightly better about giving me room when they pass and not just buzzing me. That said, high visibility does nothing for me when dinguses lay the horn on and tell me to move over and get out of their lane. When I'm all the way in the right lane, just about in the gutter, there's only so much moving over I can do. In those cases, though, I usually just yell something about my legal right to take the whole lane if I want. Not that it helps...

I'm a trained U.S. historian and I do wonder if the rights of non-motorists is the 21st century equivalent of the Civil Rights Movement. (Not that the CRM is over, nor that these are directly comparable...but they're both human rights issues. Why can't I live and move around safely and legally without using a car?)

Any sane person can see the upsides of fewer humans relying on fossil fuels for transportation. However, everyone in this thread has been buzzed, yelled at, or confronted simply for trying to get around via velo.

Imagine if golfers or swimmers or speed walkers had to put up with all this harassment and bodily threats!

I think hi viz does a very good job, or at least helps out.

For winter commuting I actually have a workwear hi viz jacket with 3M stripes across the chest/back. I hope that instead of people thinking, "Man, I hate cyclists! Let me buzz the jerk not burning fossil fuels!" that they might say, "Man, that guy was filling potholes all day, now he has to ride his bike home. I like that workerman! Let me give him plenty of room. Heck, I should stop and give him a cigarette too!" I really do think the psychology at play might work in my favor. Or, they might even think I'm a bike cop and really ride cautiously around me!

(I've been a manual laborer before.)

And motorists wonder why cyclists seem so "angry" all the time... Frankly for me, I was just darn tired of having to "train" people that should already know better, after all, they all had licenses, right?

Ironic we are having this discussion... just this morning I was nearly run over by a woman pulling her large GM SUV out of her driveway. She couldn't see out of her back side windows. She had wiped the dew off the front and back window, but not the side windows. Just as I was crossing her driveway, she started pulling out... the car was running, I just didn't hear it, it was that quiet at idle... and she didn't see me. We both stopped mid track... finally I moved cautiously behind and away from her... then she pulled out, lowered the passenger side window and gave the old apologetic wave/half smile.

Are you my father? He said the same thing the other day! I like the theory about the bike cop -- or at the very least, I do like the idea that I look like someone with road authority of some kind... Move over! I'm trying to fix your roads, car-people!

I get that all the time in the car. One side benefit of having a couple of exhaust leaks that aren't easy to get to with the welder is that I can usually just let off the throttle and they stop to see what the heck is making that weird popping noise...then I nail it past them before they remember that they don't really care as long as they can run over it without slowing down.

Because everyone got tired of being told their lights were on, of course. It's a total distraction to Americans, who are more likely to err towards 'helpful' than acknowledge it as a safety feature.

It also defies 'common sense' to run headlights in the daytime.

At least until the eclipse

Not really... daytime running lights make a lot of sense in some places... maybe not in the middle of the city, but in areas with long flat roads... daytime headlights help other drivers differentiate between an oncoming vehicle and heat haze.

Here in SE Michigan, it's getting to be most people who drive with their lights on if it's dusk/dawn or bad weather, and quite a few during the daytime. I'd guess that only perhaps 1 in 20 cars or so on the road during fog/rain/dusk don't have their lights on.

I am seeing a lot of people with burned out lights though. Last night on my way home from work I was passed when it was nearly completely dark by a car that had only one light working front or back - the rear left taillight. This baffles me - on most (american anyway) cars you could replace both headlights and all the other lights too for about $35. A single headlight is like $12. Takes about 5 minutes. You're one blown bulb from trying to drive blind in the dark. What the heck are they thinking? I wouldn't drive a car with a blown headlight except in a medical emergency, or perhaps to drive directly to Autozone and buy a new bulb.

I realize there are people with weird cars that are difficult and/or expensive to change bulbs in. Really, no excuse. If you can't afford to maintain it don't drive it.