Death Machine!
#1
Thread Starter
Extraordinary Magnitude


Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 14,081
Likes: 2,135
From: Waukesha WI
Bikes: 1978 Trek TX700; 1978/79 Trek 736; 1984 Specialized Stumpjumper Sport; 1984 Schwinn Voyageur SP; 1985 Trek 620; 1985 Trek 720; 1986 Trek 400 Elance; 1987 Schwinn High Sierra; 1990 Miyata 1000LT
Death Machine!
Everyone knows about the "death fork" and the "death stem."
What are the parts that would create the ultimate DEATH MACHINE?
I would just LOVE to get a carbon fiber frame and outfit it with all the technology that assplodes and kills people then watch the universe just fold in and turn into a black hole around the bike.
Theres the Viscount "death fork."
The AVA "death stem."
The American Classic "impaler" seat post.
The Maillard Helicomatic hub.
The Suntour Mountech.
What are the parts that would create the ultimate DEATH MACHINE?
I would just LOVE to get a carbon fiber frame and outfit it with all the technology that assplodes and kills people then watch the universe just fold in and turn into a black hole around the bike.
Theres the Viscount "death fork."
The AVA "death stem."
The American Classic "impaler" seat post.
The Maillard Helicomatic hub.
The Suntour Mountech.
__________________
*Recipient of the 2006 Time Magazine "Person Of The Year" Award*
Commence to jigglin’ huh?!?!
"But hey, always love to hear from opinionated amateurs." -says some guy to Mr. Marshall.
Commence to jigglin’ huh?!?!
"But hey, always love to hear from opinionated amateurs." -says some guy to Mr. Marshall.
#5
Senior Member


Joined: May 2012
Posts: 5,047
Likes: 4,900
From: Point Reyes Station, California
Bikes: Indeed!
Phil Wood disc brake.
Plastic Simplex front derailleur or a Campy record without that goofy little lip on the front - sure to cut your leg off.
"Dae Yung" tires - actually decent enough el cheapo tires from the seventies but, oh that name!
Drillium Campy cranks from the Italvega Superlight.
Brent
Plastic Simplex front derailleur or a Campy record without that goofy little lip on the front - sure to cut your leg off.
"Dae Yung" tires - actually decent enough el cheapo tires from the seventies but, oh that name!
Drillium Campy cranks from the Italvega Superlight.
Brent
#6
Banned.
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 27,199
Likes: 1,462
Don't forget tires on loan from rhm.
BTW, are you in this for the thrill of riding a catastrophe on wheels, the possible personal injury, or the simple wryness of it?

Either way, I'm in.
BTW, are you in this for the thrill of riding a catastrophe on wheels, the possible personal injury, or the simple wryness of it?

Either way, I'm in.
Forget the danger, think of the fun-Fabulous Thunderbirds
#7
weapons-grade bolognium


Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 6,607
Likes: 3,307
From: Across the street from Chicago
Bikes: Battaglin Cromor, Ciocc Designer 84, Schwinn Superior 1981
#10
Thread Starter
Extraordinary Magnitude


Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 14,081
Likes: 2,135
From: Waukesha WI
Bikes: 1978 Trek TX700; 1978/79 Trek 736; 1984 Specialized Stumpjumper Sport; 1984 Schwinn Voyageur SP; 1985 Trek 620; 1985 Trek 720; 1986 Trek 400 Elance; 1987 Schwinn High Sierra; 1990 Miyata 1000LT
I taunt it.
__________________
*Recipient of the 2006 Time Magazine "Person Of The Year" Award*
Commence to jigglin’ huh?!?!
"But hey, always love to hear from opinionated amateurs." -says some guy to Mr. Marshall.
Commence to jigglin’ huh?!?!
"But hey, always love to hear from opinionated amateurs." -says some guy to Mr. Marshall.
#11
Senior Member
Joined: Oct 2015
Posts: 6,280
Likes: 611
From: Los Angeles
Bikes: 78 Masi Criterium, 68 PX10, 2016 Mercian King of Mercia, Rivendell Clem Smith Jr
Hmm, this bike should have Michelin Elan tires mounted on Rigida rims, and pumped to the full pressure listed on the sidewall... 


Let's build these wheels on Weyless or Hi-E hubs, with the original skewers, laced radially except for crow's foot rear drive side.
It should have Cinelli M71 death pedals, for sure.



Let's build these wheels on Weyless or Hi-E hubs, with the original skewers, laced radially except for crow's foot rear drive side.
It should have Cinelli M71 death pedals, for sure.
Last edited by Salamandrine; 10-20-17 at 04:23 PM.
#13
Señor Member



Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 18,472
Likes: 1,556
From: Hardy, VA
Bikes: Mostly English - predominantly Raleighs
can pick your poison with wheels... either ones that will taco in a stiff breeze, or chromed steel with pads that can bring you to a stop in 2.5km.
__________________
In search of what to search for.
In search of what to search for.
#15
Senior Member
Joined: Nov 2015
Posts: 1,707
Likes: 201
From: Lacey, WA
Bikes: Stevenson Custom, Stevenson Custom Tandem, Nishiki Professional
#17
Fat Guy on a Little Bike


Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 15,946
Likes: 371
From: Philadelphia, PA
Bikes: Two wheeled ones
Teledyne frame?
#18
Banned
Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 6,480
Likes: 450
#19
aka Tom Reingold




Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 44,160
Likes: 6,381
From: New York, NY, and High Falls, NY, USA
Bikes: 1962 Rudge Sports, 1971 Raleigh Super Course, 1971 Raleigh Pro Track, 1974 Raleigh International, 1975 Viscount Fixie, 1982 McLean, 1996 Lemond (Ti), 2002 Burley Zydeco tandem
Remember the aluminum spoke nipples.
Didn't someone make aluminum brake cables for about a millisecond?
Didn't someone make aluminum brake cables for about a millisecond?
__________________
Tom Reingold, tom@noglider.com
New York City and High Falls, NY
Blogs: The Experienced Cyclist; noglider's ride blog
“When man invented the bicycle he reached the peak of his attainments.” — Elizabeth West, US author
Please email me rather than PM'ing me. Thanks.
Tom Reingold, tom@noglider.com
New York City and High Falls, NY
Blogs: The Experienced Cyclist; noglider's ride blog
“When man invented the bicycle he reached the peak of his attainments.” — Elizabeth West, US author
Please email me rather than PM'ing me. Thanks.
#20
And if some company did indeed make aluminum cables, they were plain loco.......
__________________
72 Line Seeker
83 Davidson Signature
84 Peugeot PSV
84 Peugeot PY10FC
84 Gitane Tour de France.
85 Vitus Plus Carbone 7
86 ALAN Record Carbonio
86 Medici Aerodynamic (Project)
88 Pinarello Montello
89 Bottecchia Professional Chorus SL
95 Trek 5500 OCLV (Project)
72 Line Seeker
83 Davidson Signature
84 Peugeot PSV
84 Peugeot PY10FC
84 Gitane Tour de France.
85 Vitus Plus Carbone 7
86 ALAN Record Carbonio
86 Medici Aerodynamic (Project)
88 Pinarello Montello
89 Bottecchia Professional Chorus SL
95 Trek 5500 OCLV (Project)
#21
Senior Member


Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 12,565
Likes: 2,739
From: Thunder Bay, Ontario, Canada - burrrrr!
Bikes: 1958 Rabeneick 120D, 1968 Legnano Gran Premio, 196? Torpado Professional, 2000 Marinoni Piuma
Carbon fiber fork and wheel rims scare me to death, however, to be honest, I have never used either except for a very short while - a Bianchi I bought once had had a carbon fiber fork installed, replacing the original aluminum one. I rode the bike two times with the plastic fork and then swapped it out, going back to the original fork that the bike was issued with.
Why do I fear plastic bikes? I have heard bad things regarding them, bad enough for me to do a search on Carbon Fiber Bicycle Crashes. If that does not turn you off of carbon fiber bikes and components..?
Just guessing about this next comment, but I cannot help but believe that, at one point in time, the Simplex(Dupont Delrin plastic) derailleurs were thought to be the cat's butt. Of course, they were not all that great. In fact, their presence, at times, cracks me up:-(
Why do I fear plastic bikes? I have heard bad things regarding them, bad enough for me to do a search on Carbon Fiber Bicycle Crashes. If that does not turn you off of carbon fiber bikes and components..?
Just guessing about this next comment, but I cannot help but believe that, at one point in time, the Simplex(Dupont Delrin plastic) derailleurs were thought to be the cat's butt. Of course, they were not all that great. In fact, their presence, at times, cracks me up:-(
__________________
"98% of the bikes I buy are projects".
"98% of the bikes I buy are projects".
#22
Patina Avoider


Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 3,279
Likes: 1,072
From: Maryland, USA
Bikes: Drysdale/Gitane/Zeus/Masi/Falcon/Palo Alto/Vitus
Cable-Less front derailleur?
__________________
Larry:1958 Drysdale, 1961 Gitane Gran Sport, 1974 Zeus track, 1988 Masi Gran Corsa, 1974 Falcon, 1980 Palo Alto, 198? Vitus 979. Susan: 1976 Windsor Profesional.
Larry:1958 Drysdale, 1961 Gitane Gran Sport, 1974 Zeus track, 1988 Masi Gran Corsa, 1974 Falcon, 1980 Palo Alto, 198? Vitus 979. Susan: 1976 Windsor Profesional.
#23
At the local bike co op I volunteer at, a kid came in with carbon fiber bars snapped in half. I don't know if he crashed or they just broke. Either way, it left me feeling uneasy. Steel is real
#24
Are you building the cycling worlds most scariest Halloween display? I am not sure the little kids in the neighborhood will get it?
__________________
My bikes: 1970`s Roberts - 1981 Miyata 912 - 1980`s Ocshner (Chrome) - 1987 Schwinn Circuit - 1987 Schwinn Prologue - 1992 Schwinn Crosspoint - 1999 Schwinn Circuit - 2014 Cannondale Super Six EVO
My bikes: 1970`s Roberts - 1981 Miyata 912 - 1980`s Ocshner (Chrome) - 1987 Schwinn Circuit - 1987 Schwinn Prologue - 1992 Schwinn Crosspoint - 1999 Schwinn Circuit - 2014 Cannondale Super Six EVO
#25
Thread Starter
Extraordinary Magnitude


Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 14,081
Likes: 2,135
From: Waukesha WI
Bikes: 1978 Trek TX700; 1978/79 Trek 736; 1984 Specialized Stumpjumper Sport; 1984 Schwinn Voyageur SP; 1985 Trek 620; 1985 Trek 720; 1986 Trek 400 Elance; 1987 Schwinn High Sierra; 1990 Miyata 1000LT
Would someone PLEASE think about the children!?!?!
__________________
*Recipient of the 2006 Time Magazine "Person Of The Year" Award*
Commence to jigglin’ huh?!?!
"But hey, always love to hear from opinionated amateurs." -says some guy to Mr. Marshall.
Commence to jigglin’ huh?!?!
"But hey, always love to hear from opinionated amateurs." -says some guy to Mr. Marshall.





