On most organized bike rides and club rides, guys outnumber women by a wide margin. And, they tend to be fitter and more affluent than average.

Something to think about if Mr. I Won't Move My Butt starts to get old.

your bike probably doesnt fit him

Plus the zombies will prolly go for the targets with more meat on their bones. Thin down and get faster!

And on the "car in the shop" thing... I dropped my van off to have some major work done, and the folks at the dealership were amazed at two things:

1. I didn't particularly care how long the job took or when I got the car back. I just told them to call me when it was done... who cares? I'd rather ride my bike anyways...
2. I didn't want a ride anywhere in their courtesy van when I dropped the car off. They looked at me like I had three eyes when I got my bicycle out of the back of the van and rode away!

Most people never think about using a bicycle to actually get anywhere. It just stuns them when they see anyone using a bicycle as something other than a toy.

It's unfortunate that that is the case. Bikes are truly the greatest invention man has ever created:

When man invented the bicycle he reached the peak of his attainments. Here was a machine of precision and balance for the convenience of man. And (unlike subsequent inventions for man's convenience) the more he used it, the fitter his body became. Here, for once, was a product of man's brain that was entirely beneficial to those who used it, and of no harm or irritation to others. Progress should have stopped when man invented the bicycle. ~Elizabeth West, Hovel in the Hills

I argue that it did.

I dropped my car off at the mechanic once and took my bike off the roof rack to go to work. The owner/mechanic saw me, complimented me on my bike, told me he rides in the park and told me to be safe. Pretty cool experience.

Be a positive example, but don't preach unless your audience is there to be preached to.

Depending on the context, I can very much resent somebody else telling me how I should live my life.

I'm sure the boyfriend could also find a number of girls who'd be willing to give him a ride from the mechanic without question so you need to be careful to make sure any kind of prodding toward a less sedentary lifestyle is done in a good natured, low pressure way.

hah! Maybe pick up some pamphlets they have on other home improvement projects like how to build a deck, or how to remodel the kitchen while you're at it. Make sure he brings his cell phone in case he gets too far away to make it back under his own power.

If you really want to embarrass him borrow/rent a tandem and pick him up

I mean it could work or he might just call a cab, or his mother, for a ride.

I've got it! Leave your BF with the guy's family that keeps jacking his ride time in the other thread and then go ride with the dude. Problem solved!

Or go find a new BF. Either way.

Are the responses here so bad that she has to find another BikeForums?

Yes, clearly. OR MAYBE there might be certain other words that could be abbreviated "BF" that might be relevant to this thread.

You should both get into shape, and if he isn't keen on it find a new boyfriend.

life is too short to be unhealthy imo.

My wife rides and was actually instrumental in getting me back on the bike following a months long hiatus. About three years ago, when I was still doing a lot of riding, I wanted to encourage her to ride with me. I bought her a really nice Trek for $1.8k with the hope that she'd be excited and start riding. It may have gotten 20 miles on it before is literally sat for the next 2.5 years in the garage. During that time I stopped riding. About 6 months ago, and following a year of dieting where she lost 40 lbs, she decided she should start riding. At last she got in to it, seriously. Sometimes it just takes a while for seeds we plant to sprout. The even better thing for me was that it got me motivated to get back on the bike. Now I'm even commuting via bike.

(But, I don't want to discount the potency of my threat to trade my 105 components for her Ultegra components if she didn't start using that bike...)

LMAO, that's pretty well exactly what I told MY non-cycling boyfriend . He said that's fine with him, when the apocalypse comes he wants to go out in the first wave anyway, as he'd rather die than hide out in the mountains (that would involve camping, you see).

My sister can't figure out what I see in him...

Dtmfa

Brad Pitt is a bit intimidating for a chubby guy, I know, Polish Bike Team. That ones in the forums too.

You really do have to be real careful getting newbies involved. I have a neighbor with a pretty decent bike, but never rides further then a few miles. I was telling him about the M.U.P. a few miles from where we live. He said he would like to go sometime.

When the day came I tried to keep in mind that he wasn't really up to my level (he's around 30ish hardly rides his bike, I'm nearly 50ish and commuted for 7 years on everything from rusty old huffy cruisers up to 20 miles one way). I checked out his bike (he had it tuned up recently), made sure he had enough water, and tried to teach him to down shift when climbing (It's pretty flat here but there is an underpass on the way to the MUP and the MUP itself has a couple of steep rollers). I kept things at (what for me was a leisurely almost boring) level. I kept up a conversation as we rode. I made sure we took breaks once we got to the MUP.

It was a little over 6 miles to the MUP and we went an additional 3 miles on the MUP and he called it quits (the short climbs got him). He has gone back to the MUP once that I know of, with a friend of his that is about his level, but he has turned down all my invitations to go back out with me.

Having someone to ride with is fun in it's own way but I didn't get much of a work out, the other guy got too much of a work out (he said he hurt for days afterward). I tried to be very moderate but I guess it didn't work out so well. I guess sometimes we forget just how hard it can be for folks that aren't used to riding.

It was a kitchen renovation that got ME out riding more to get away from the mess...

Just do it yourself and love it. It may rub off eventually. If he has a bike that fits, that can be a huge help. I found myself with an ill-fitting bike for a couple of years and my riding time went way down. When I finally got back on a bike that fit, I was amazed, and immediately started riding more often and farther again. My wife works out at the gym, but didn't even think about biking, but she encouraged me because I was not going to the gym, and she thought I could use the workout. Then we went on vacation last summer. I took my bike with me, and she rented one because it was easier than driving around (and because she had no gym, so she figured she could use the work out). A couple of months later she ended up buying a bike for herself.

She's still a little wimpy about weather and utility cycling in general. She goes for a ride when it's not too wet or too hot, but lately I've been getting her to go for more functional trips, like going to eat on our bikes, and she bought lights for her bike, which means that she's at least considering some evening rides (I think that's mainly because it's too hot in the daytime for her). She may come around yet, but even her level of cycling now is impressive when you consider that a year ago she didn't own and had no interest in owning a bike. But in her case laziness and lack of fitness were never issues. It was enough to open her eyes to the fun of it and to the fact that she was already perfectly capable.

My wife has been slowly getting into utility cycling, but she's generally a non-exerciser (like me) who hates getting sweaty. I've been very gentle in my encouragement, and it's been working. Here's what I do:

1) When I first started talking her into rides, I made them rides that she would like. Short, slow, and stopping at antique stores and coffee shops. I try to keep it fun.

2) I always went on and on in my praise afterwards, telling her how in no time she would be faster than me, etc.

3) We did rides in the morning and evening when it was cool, so she wouldn't get hot or have to sunscreen up.

4) I built her a custom bike, and made it super pretty, so she could get excited about riding. I had her tell me her wants and needs, and favorite colors.

The result is that we now regularly ride to parties and errands.

+1

"Soft tissue" issues are a big problem. I need to visit my LBS and get some help finding the right saddle and get my bike fitted properly, which I foolishly didn't take time for when I bought it. Buying a nice Brooks sprung saddle didn't do the trick. Maybe take him to a good LBS and buy a reasonable men's bike and have him pay to get it properly fitted? He'll wander in again to buy a really nice bike after he's hooked.

Also, fixing his diet will be far more effective at shedding weight than exercise alone. Removing sugar and HFCS (and artificials, ESPECIALLY Nutrisweet) will do wonders. You need to do this too of course. Once I lost most of the fat I was lugging around, exercise became a lot more fun and took care of the rest.

Well, riding on an improperly sized bike is hard. He needs his own bike.

Just remind him that the leg muscles that he builds up bicycling are the same ones he uses for other fun. Stamina on the bike builds stamina in the bedroom.

You have missed the obvious, GO AT HER PACE, and go as far as she wants. And don't whine about going slow, or complain about how it stinks that you are missing a training ride or whatever

She will never keep up with it if you take her out and drop her every time.

This goes for men or women, all new riders, rie with them like they are children. Go slow, talk to them, make it fun, make it easy, especially in the beginning. And make sure they are on a working, decent, comfortable bike.

Part of the problem is she's riding an EXTREMELY highly geared single speed bike. It's her brother in law's bike. He's the same height she is, so the fit is pretty close. But she just gets tired. She is getting her own bike built by her dad, but wont likely be ready for a little while.

I try to go at a much more relaxed pace, I try to let her lead, but I often times get ahead of her, (usually because we ride side by side, and when a car comes, I speed up to get in front of her.)

Is there a women's club near you? Or a group that goes at a more relaxed pace? Getting discouraged will make it harder for her to stay interested. Or do more "destination" rides where she sets the pace & you just follow.

*edit* - Just saw your last post. Yeah, a new bike with better gearing could make all the difference - hopefully it gets built up soon!