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-   -   Hostile Post Environment? (https://www.bikeforums.net/road-cycling/586062-hostile-post-environment.html)

Bearonabike 09-19-09 06:31 PM


Originally Posted by DrPete (Post 9706306)
Have you ever considered that someone might wear a nice outfit to feel good about themselves? I can assure you from the women I know and have talked to, this is far more often the case than wanting to be ogled by drunk dudes at bars.

While I agree, I am keying off the term "provocative." My wife loves to wear tasteful but flattering clothing. However, when one decides to dress provocatively, then they are looking to provoke a specific type of response. Ref: http://www.thefreedictionary.com/provocative

DrPete 09-19-09 06:32 PM


Originally Posted by Bearonabike (Post 9706326)
While I agree, I am keying off the term "provocative." My wife loves to wear tasteful but flattering clothing. However, when one decides to dress provocatively, then they are looking to provoke a specific type of response. Ref: http://www.thefreedictionary.com/provocative

There are people who think showing ankle is provocative. Bottom line is that it's up to the man to not be "provoked." I'm sure there are men out there who would consider your wife's "tasteful but flattering" clothing provocative.

Randochap 09-19-09 06:35 PM

Testosterone ... ah, those were the days. :50:

trigger 09-19-09 06:44 PM


Originally Posted by Bearonabike (Post 9706101)
The worst I've seen for a female, especially a newbie, is someone taking a few extra minutes to explain something. While I'm sure the infrequent flame has occurred, I believe it to be far from the norm.

When I introduced myself in the Introductions thread, it took about 2 posts before it was suggested that I'd better post a pic. Nobody suggested the guys post a pic. I personally was not offended by that, but in an "Introductions" thread particularly, I can see how that would be off-putting to a new female poster. Not a flame, granted, but something to think about.

PLEASE do not take us down the "she dressed that way so she asked for it" debate. Again, as with the racial jokes and commentary, I really, really thought that'd we all progressed beyond that. Seriously. :(

BarracksSi 09-19-09 06:48 PM


Originally Posted by trigger (Post 9706376)
When I introduced myself in the Introductions thread, it took about 2 posts before it was suggested that I'd better post a pic.

You took it seriously?

The Weak Link 09-19-09 06:50 PM

On a recent training ride I saw, from a distance, a woman who was riding in Lycra shorts (that's OK) and only a sports bra, to which she had attached, at the cleavage, her IPod and cell phone.

In a strictly medical assessment I believe she also had surgically enhanced mammary glands.

She has every right to dress that way if she so chooses. She should not be harrassed.

But Good God Almighty, you'd think some of these people don't have a lick of common sense to their name. Should she be surprised if some pickup truck driving redneck gazes at her? To ride around dressed like that in rural Kentucky is just an act of clueless stupidity.

Bearonabike 09-19-09 06:54 PM


Originally Posted by The Weak Link (Post 9706397)
On a recent training ride I saw, from a distance, a woman who was riding in Lycra shorts (that's OK) and only a sports bra, to which she had attached, at the cleavage, her IPod and cell phone.

In a strictly medical assessment I believe she also had surgically enhanced mammary glands.

She has every right to dress that way if she so chooses. She should not be harrassed.

But Good God Almighty, you'd think some of these people don't have a lick of common sense to their name. Should she be surprised if some pickup truck driving redneck gazes at her? To ride around dressed like that in rural Kentucky is just an act of clueless stupidity.

+100

No means no and I have no problem throwing any bum who crosses that line UNDER the jail. But anyone who presents themselves in public in a fashion that will provoke the "lowest common denominator" is simply stupid, and I believe EVERY responsible mother in the world would agree with me and educate their daughters likewise; but I sometimes wonder about some of the people on BF.

trigger 09-19-09 06:57 PM


Originally Posted by Bearonabike (Post 9706419)
+100

No means no and I have no problem throwing any bum who crosses that line UNDER the jail. But anyone who presents themselves in public in a fashion that will provoke the "lowest common denominator" is simply stupid, and I believe EVERY responsible mother in the world would agree with me and educate their daughters likewise; but I sometimes wonder about some of the people on BF.

+1

Ok, cool. You had me worried there for a minute. :D

Bearonabike 09-19-09 06:58 PM


Originally Posted by DrPete (Post 9706332)
There are people who think showing ankle is provocative. Bottom line is that it's up to the man to not be "provoked." I'm sure there are men out there who would consider your wife's "tasteful but flattering" clothing provocative.

True, but she's NOT wearing a short skirt that prohibits her leaning too far forward, and her blouse is in no danger of riding so low that we can see circular patterns. Heck, if you look hard enough, you will find someone somewhere that will get turned on by the sight of a woman in a chicken suit, making that "provocative" regardless of intent. Still, what you wear is a poster for what's in your soul...


Further thought about this statement: "you will find someone somewhere that will get turned on by the sight of a woman in a chicken suit" has resulted in :twitchy:

The Weak Link 09-19-09 07:06 PM

Women in chicken suits are febrile.

Good night, Gracie.

spry 09-19-09 07:42 PM


Originally Posted by The Weak Link (Post 9706397)
On a recent training ride I saw, from a distance, a woman who was riding in Lycra shorts (that's OK) and only a sports bra, to which she had attached, at the cleavage, her IPod and cell phone.

In a strictly medical assessment I believe she also had surgically enhanced mammary glands.

She has every right to dress that way if she so chooses. She should not be harrassed.

But Good God Almighty, you'd think some of these people don't have a lick of common sense to their name. Should she be surprised if some pickup truck driving redneck gazes at her? To ride around dressed like that in rural Kentucky is just an act of clueless stupidity.

Good Ol 'Kentucky home.
Home of fast race horses,and even faster women.
From the precise description I 'm surprised you did not drive into a wall you voyeur.:D

Machka 09-19-09 08:38 PM


Originally Posted by The Weak Link (Post 9706214)
To the 150 million women of America: I apologize. I apologize for all the acts of unkindness, insensitivity and violence that have been committed by all the male pigs running around.

What about the women of other countries?

Tulex 09-19-09 08:39 PM


Originally Posted by DrPete (Post 9706134)
Flirting doesn't make it OK to lob inappropriate comments. Obviously there have been women on here who get some weird kick out of said inappropriate stuff and feed their egos on it, but that's as big a problem as anything simply because it doesn't belong out in the open forum.

In the same way that dressing provocatively isn't an invitation for unwanted sexual advances, an avatar/sig that display some bit of sexuality are not a big red flag saying "please be vulgar around me."

Sorry, I disagree. The advance isn't wrong, taking it beyond that when told to stop is. A woman dressing provocatively is like any animal in the animal kingdom showing colors. It is done to get attention. If a woman doesn't want the attention, don't ask for it.

And regardless of if a person is wrong for acting on mixed signals, I don't think you find too many people that will feel sorry for the victim. Most people will reply that if you don't like it, don't be a tease.

The Weak Link 09-19-09 08:40 PM


Originally Posted by Machka (Post 9706837)
What about the women of other countries?

I've not yet had time to offend them. They will have to wait their turn.

"Hey dyevushka krasavitsa, u minya ni oishin tolsti."

Machka 09-19-09 08:41 PM


Originally Posted by trigger (Post 9706376)
When I introduced myself in the Introductions thread, it took about 2 posts before it was suggested that I'd better post a pic. Nobody suggested the guys post a pic. I personally was not offended by that, but in an "Introductions" thread particularly, I can see how that would be off-putting to a new female poster. Not a flame, granted, but something to think about.

When I first came to bicycling forums, I just plunged right in and started talking bicycles and rides. It took 6+ months before anyone guessed I was female.

Ih8lucky13 09-19-09 08:58 PM


Originally Posted by Machka (Post 9706850)
When I first came to bicycling forums, I just plunged right in and started talking bicycles and rides. It took 6+ months before anyone guessed I was female.

Are you a female ?

Machka 09-19-09 09:11 PM


Originally Posted by Ih8lucky13 (Post 9706917)
Are you a female ?

It may come as a surprise to some ... but .... yep, I sure am!! :D



I'm a female whose occupations of choice were Engineering Technology and Software Development, fields field with few females in them (at least at the time I was in them); who has worked in an Engineering office where I was the sole female among about 30+ males; who made a re-entry into cycling via bodybuilding for a couple years in a gym that was predominantly male; and who was often the only female out there when I raced bicycles and while I've been involved in Randonneuring.

In general, I probably relate better to males than I do to females.

Ih8lucky13 09-19-09 10:20 PM


Originally Posted by Machka (Post 9706974)
It may come as a surprise to some ... but .... yep, I sure am!! :D



I'm a female whose occupations of choice were Engineering Technology and Software Development, fields field with few females in them (at least at the time I was in them); who has worked in an Engineering office where I was the sole female among about 30+ males; who made a re-entry into cycling via bodybuilding for a couple years in a gym that was predominantly male; and who was often the only female out there when I raced bicycles and while I've been involved in Randonneuring.

In general, I probably relate better to males than I do to females.

Are you hot ? :p






Sorry I could not resist.

banerjek 09-19-09 10:46 PM


Originally Posted by Tulex (Post 9706843)
Sorry, I disagree. The advance isn't wrong, taking it beyond that when told to stop is. A woman dressing provocatively is like any animal in the animal kingdom showing colors. It is done to get attention. If a woman doesn't want the attention, don't ask for it.

That's my thinking. I assure you that guys do the same thing to other guys who dress provocatively. Many of the rules are similar. Show too much skin, wear stuff that's too tight or something that accentuates your form, etc and you will draw attention and the guys will start picking on you and many people will assume you are an idiot.

There is no doubt that BF is a hostile post environment. We are merciless with everyone for any identifiable qualities they have. That's how they know we've accepted them as belonging here.

pacificaslim 09-19-09 11:06 PM

It's more complicated than that. Women decide whether even a simple, polite "advance" or "compliment" is acceptable or not based on the attractiveness of the guy making the advance or compliment. If it's the creepy guy from accounting, it's never acceptable: if it's the rich, powerful, attractive Brad Pitt look alike from the law firm across the hall, even the most tactless advance is always acceptable. How's a guy to know which category the woman will put him into? Hmm...

msincredible 09-19-09 11:10 PM


Originally Posted by pacificaslim (Post 9707394)
It's more complicated than that. Women decide whether even a simple, polite "advance" or "compliment" is acceptable or not based on the attractiveness of the guy making the advance or compliment. If it's the creepy guy from accounting, it's never acceptable: if it's the rich, powerful, attractive Brad Pitt look alike from the law firm across the hall, even the most tactless advance is always acceptable. How's a guy to know which category the woman will put him into? Hmm...

Incorrect.

banerjek 09-19-09 11:15 PM


Originally Posted by pacificaslim (Post 9707394)
How's a guy to know which category the woman will put him into? Hmm...

Just become a cycling stud, and you won't have to worry about these things...

cccorlew 09-19-09 11:42 PM


Originally Posted by Machka (Post 9706850)
When I first came to bicycling forums, I just plunged right in and started talking bicycles and rides. It took 6+ months before anyone guessed I was female.

Six months to click the links to the rather excellent links in your sig? Darn it, some folks are are slow here.

banerjek 09-19-09 11:58 PM


Originally Posted by cccorlew (Post 9707524)
Six months to click the links to the rather excellent links in your sig? Darn it, some folks are are slow here.

Idiocy is our specialty. It never occurred to me that machka wasn't a woman specifically for the reason you mention.

What I don't understand is how machak can look so good after all the miles he's been ridden.

logdrum 09-20-09 12:56 AM

Obviously, a lot of you do not have strong woman-wear-the-pants wives. I think PCAD has one. Me too! Most of the conversations in this thread will change tone.

Having said that most women will turn me on! I just can't help it although I enjoy conversations and intelligence as well. Sorry but that's just a fact of MY life.

In my youth when I was even openly poly-amorous, I always knew that women have the upper hand in a lot of things maybe most things. I also know that the hottest bod doesn't yield the best sex experience.

As my daughter turns into a woman, my views on the hot young female are beginning to change in fact women in general. The closer it is to you, the more important it is. Things that I accepted with male gusto like facials, being roasted etc now feel weird, sadistic and threatening.

Where is Beth road to know where. I'll be interested to know her views.


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