It's a good thing that you didn't.

Seat bag and top tube mounted pump on my winter/rain bike and pockets for the go-fast bikes.

It solves the numbness issue as well.

You should try it...

-Z

Since I have a fizik saddle, I have the medium size bag that clips into the ICS slot. In said bag I carry: 1 multitool, 1 patch kit, 1 spare tube (for when a patch aint gonna cut it), 2 CO2 "cannisters", 1 valve for CO2, 2 tire levers. This bag almost never gets opened because I so rarely flat. I just toss it in the bike gear bag on the way to a ride, clip it on to saddle for ride, then toss it back in the bag when im done. Simple. Wish there was a large ICS saddle bag tho, I would put more stuff in there, but there aint any spare room.

I carry gels, shotblocks, etc in my right jersey pocket. I have a little satchel I keep my DL, debit card, cell, and car key in my center jersey pocket. If I need a boot for a tire, I'll just use the cover for the debit card in a pinch.

Left jersey pocket is for extra clothes I shed during a ride, such as warmers, vest, etc.

Also have a frame pump I recently picked up. It really isn't for myself, its for the other sods in the club who keep getting flats all the time. CO2 is for me

Old beat up Pedros seat bag made from recycled tubes. The holes are big enough for the hex wrenches I used to carry to fall out, so I got a multi tool.

oh that's clever

I usually carry co2 cartridges, an extra tube, patches, 2 tire irons in my saddle bag.

In my shirt pockets I carry my ipod, couple of sandwiches, usually a slice of pizza with extra cheese, and some condoms.

You weren't. Sometimes it's helpful to take more than 2 bottles, and you can't always stop for more.

oh no. umd says i'm stupid.

Call yourself stupid if you want, I only said you weren't clever.

there's a fine line between clever and stupid.

Mmmm, latex-flavoured pizza.

Ribbed sandwiches...

I keep 1 tube, 2 Co2's, 2 tire levers and a small multitool in one of my son's spare blood sugar meter bags. That then goes in my center pocket.

I hate to carry anything that I have no chance or very very little chance of using. I hate even more carrying stuff in my back pockets if I can help it. Over time, i have narrowed what I carry to what I am likely to ever use:

Spare tubular pre-glued (under the seat)
small mini pump
can of Vittoria PitStop
iPhone wrapped in cash inside a ziplock bag in center pocket.

That is it. Anything else is either unnecessary or I'll call my team car (wife) for help.

BTW, I do second the idea of the extra water bottles. Sometimes I wished I did that when I go on longer rides through areas that would take me 2-3 hr before I see a place where I can refill the bottles.

I for one have eschewed all forms of bike-mounted storage. I keep a bottle in each outside jersey pocket, and snacks and a spare tube in the middle. I also carry a CO2 inflator, but you don't want to know where.

an old mtn biker trick was to wrap a tube around each wheelhub and then duct tape the ends to hold it on.

+1, In addition everything you mentioned, I also carry a patch kit, and shraeder to presta adapter, a mini tool w/ chain device, and a spoke wrench. All in my pockets.

My handlebar bag is so small that I'd say it does not look too Fredish. Just big enough to carry a couple energy bars, emergency tool kit, and an extra tube.. Comes in handy for myself and others. I carry more stuff when anyone else in my club.. One time a member lost the screws in his Look Cleats. He'd been screwed because no one else had them in their wedge. But, I did.. Thanks to slightly more carry capacity thanks to my petit handlebar bag. It measures about 2"x4x6" and an attractive yellow vinyl bag.. . That is not too Fredish.?

I've been looking at a bunch of saddle bags, but most of them look like more hassle than they're worth. I thought about the PBK storage bottle thing which seemed like a great idea, but then I figured I might as well just find an old bottle with a wide lid to use instead. Cheapest and most straightforward solution.

I load my jersey pockets with 10lbs of sh*t so my bike looks like a pro bike with no saddle bag.

This gets my vote.
Handlebar bag gets the camera, tissues and nourishment.
I also carry a first aid kit. If you ever get a road serious rash, you will wish you had one.