i ride in basketball shorts, basketball t-shirt, basketball shoes ( i don't actually know how to play basketball though ), DJ headphones ( i don't know how to DJ either ), no helmet ( i need to buy one ) and no sunglasses ( need to buy some )

also today for the first time i felt an irritating amount of drag from my beard, i think i might shave it

oh and i am using a women's comfort seat ( Specialized Lithia Gel )

my bike is quite decent though - all Ultegra, 53/39, 12-25

so how Fred am i ?

also what should be the first steps to reduce my Fredliness ?

Stop posting on BF

Your quads are way too massive and your sheer strength is way too much for you to be considered a Fred. So don't worry about all that and just keep hammering it out on your 60t/10 gear.

looks like the forum is going to die if everyone follows your advice

my quads are 25" ... still ... even though i lost 30 pounds since i started posting here.

i am now mostly riding in something like 53/16 - i managed to build up my cadence to almost where it should be

i don't want that 11 cog or 56 chainring any more.

walk away. don't ride away. walk away.

you cannot possibly be serious right? this isn't even remotely funny

What color stripe on your tube sox?

why should it be funny ?

not sure what you mean. but the sneakers are about 12 years old. i got them back in high school. they refuse to fall apart. all the sneakers i have bought since them are long since gone.

my biggest fear is that once i get a helmet i won't be able to find headphones with equally nice bass that fit into the ears.

I dunno how anyone can ride somewhat seriously without clipless pedals

Get rid of those Ultegra brifters, I mean like RIGHT NOW. You need to have a left RSX triple with right side 105, 9 speed. Having SORA derailers is extra FRED points.

so you ride in sneakers and want a power meter? interesting.

The only time you may take your outfit off the MUP is when you ride on the sidewalk.

how do you mostly ride in 53x16? do you not have changes in wind and elevation? also 53x16 at a normal 90 rpm is 23 mph, if you're doing full rides into any wind condition or grade at 23 mph in sneakers and flapping shorts and t shirt you are my hero.

Not even Fred-level. That look is more like multiple DWI offender garb. On a stolen bike.

Maybe you can read Bike Snob's new book.

The SF Bay area is famous for being both unsettlingly flat and eerily windless.

no i mean on average. i do shift all the time. in fact most of the time i am shifting back and forth between two gears because i want to be in between them

as for mph - i need a computer.

your thread is useless without pics

You sound more like a troll than a Fred.

this is what i wore when i rode today:

I heart Fred

Wow this thread is getting pretty serious.